Page 55 of Tameron

Tameron swallowed heavily, but he said nothing, and I knew it wasn’t his place to give away Nash’s secrets.

“But because your guys get it, maybe rely on them. Tell them what you need. Stop shutting everyone out.”

“Easier said than done,” he muttered, glancing away.

I tapped his chin until he was looking at me once more. ‘I know,’ I signed, ‘but it helps to try.’

He groaned, then thrust his hips forward. “Can’t you just kiss me and forget about all this heavy stuff?”

I grinned. “Yeah.” Pinching his chin between my fingers, I drew his lips to mine. It was hot but mostly PG for the neighbors. When I pulled back, I let out a heavy sigh and knocked our foreheads together. “I have to be at work at six in the morning, or I’d invite you over.”

“It’s okay. But…can we plan something soon?”

“Yes. Please,” I added. I needed him to know I wanted to spend time with him. I wanted this—whatever it was, for however long he wanted me back. “Text me later.”

“Tonight,” he said. “Maybe…maybe we can try something over the phone?”

Oh. I hadn’t thought of that. “That sounds nice. FaceTime?”

“Yeah,” he said, his voice a little thready. “I’ll be up. I haven’t been sleeping well.”

I kissed him again, longer this time, deeper, like a promise of what was to come the next time I could keep him in my arms for longer than a few minutes. “Let me know when you’re ready for an overnight. I’ll fuck you into a deep, deep sleep.” Maybe that was too much. Too far.

But he shuddered and groaned, rocking his half-hard cock against my thigh. “I’d like that.”

“Yeah?”

He was silent for a long beat before he met my gaze and nodded. “Yes.”

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

TAMERON

Stop shutting everyone out.

Dayton’s words kept playing through my head. Was he right that I had been closing myself off from the others? Nash, not so much, but Creek and Bean? I had…and that hurt to admit.

I thought we’d been there for each other, had each other’s backs, but the truth was that I was there for them and had their backs…but I wasn’t allowing them to return the favor.

Nash always said I was too much in my head, that I always tried to figure out my own stuff, and he wasn’t wrong. I didn’t like to rely on others, not even on those closest to me.

Maybe also because Creek and Bean were so happy now that they’d found love. Creek had had such a hard time accepting the loss of his leg, and Bean… While I was well aware that it wasn’t a competition to see which of us had it the worst, the fact was that if this were up for a whose-life-sucks-the-most award, Bean would win hands down. He had no choice but to depend on others since his brain constantly let him down. I would’ve gone mad in his shoes.

So now that they were both happy and in love, it was a thousand times harder to burden them with my issues. I refusedto bring them down, and besides, it wasn’t like they could help me anyway. No one could.

They couldn’t help me learn ASL. They couldn’t process what the loss of my hearing meant for me. They couldn’t be expected to make all the accommodations for me like Dayton’s family did with the mirrors and the round tables. I’d never felt more at home anywhere, more seen, but how did I leave my whole world behind and move into their world, into Deaf culture?

I had so many questions and no answers, so many problems and no solutions, so many challenges and no energy left to rise to meet them. I was tired. Exhausted.

So maybe Dayton did have a point that I should open up more. Not because the others could help me, but because they could listen and offer a shoulder to lean on. Fuck, I sucked at leaning on others. But I would try.

Nash had asked for a dinner with all of us minus partners, saying we had some updates to share, and so we sat around the table, enjoying a lovely seafood pasta Bean had made. He’d come a long way in his cooking skills, and we were all grateful for it.

“This is delicious, Bean,” Nash said, shoveling another forkful into his mouth.

Bean flashed him a broad smile. “Thank you. It’s a favorite at the bar as well.”

“It could use a bit more heat,” I said, only teasing him a little. Bean couldn’t always tell when we were teasing him, so we’d all dialed back on messing with him. It was no fun when someone ended up hurt.

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