Page 155 of Devotion

Circe. My love. Where are you?

I try to rise, but pain lances through my head, down my spine. As it does, flashes of faces, places, assault my mind.

People I know. Or knew.

A man in a robe, shaking his head in disapproval. My father? My…

Another man, tall, too tall, towering over me. Sandy hair. So much like my other…

I vomit, the fever wracking my body with aches, searing heat. The cold of the filth around me drive me on. Just another hand forward, another foot. Blood, so much blood.

“Time to get up, Ernie.”

Who? Me? Oh. Yeah. From before the…

More flashes. Faces of people I hurt. SO many. Too many. I block it all out, clamp my eyes shut. They’re nightmares.

Or are they memories from another lifetime?

“Oh good, you’re up. The children will be so happy to see you.” Circe leans on the bed, resting her warm, soft hand on my chest.

“The children?” I croak, my voice dry and broken.

“Darling, you’ve been…asleep for a while,” she explains, turning my face to look into her eyes. Those eyes. So green. Like the ocean.

“How long?” I mutter.

“It’s not important. You were in an accident, sweetheart.” She speaks the truth. I remember trauma. Pain. “You’re still recovering. Give it time.”

A loud noise, I’m falling. Panic spirals through my head.

I sit up, gasping.

She’s gone.

My feet hit cold floor. The room is dark. I am alone. The paint peels off the walls. The windows are dark with grime. I remember someone dragging me out of the ditch. Taking me away.

I dreamt that I died.

I wish I would have. The splitting fissure in my brain makes me nauseous.

Anger wells up. Someone did this. Someone needs to pay.

Staggering from the dirty mattress, I reach the bathroom door. The mirror is smudged, but there I am. Unshaven. Black hair.

“Is this me?”

“The one and only.” She giggles. “I made breakfast. Get it while it’s hot.”

Delicious smells fill my nostrils, distracting me from the man in the mirror. I’m starving.

I know my way down the hall, past the boys’ rooms. Empty. Why are they empty?

Who are the boys?

Shaking my head, I nearly double over. But I have nothing in my stomach to puke.

Food. Breakfast. Right. Circe has breakfast waiting. Don’t want to leave her hanging.