Page 36 of Daydreams & Doughnut Cake

If things had been different... if Mark had never split with Elsa... might Danny and I have got together?

He took a step towards me and I felt the warmth of his fingers grazing my bare arm.

His touch sent a little shock through me, pulling me out of my daze. I held up my hands. ‘No, Danny. We promised we wouldn’t go there again.’

Still, our eyes lingered on one another.

Then he looked away. ‘Of course,’ he murmured. ‘Sorry.’

Now I felt terrible. ‘Danny, you’ve got nothing to be sorry about. It’s just... well, it’s just the way it is.’

‘Yes.’ He gave me a slow smile full of warmth. ‘It’s been great seeing you, though, Rosie.’

‘I know,’ I said, smiling back, feeling myself starting to weaken.

Was I really just going to wave goodbye now? I might never see Danny again...

The ring of my mobile brought me firmly back to reality.

Ellie’s name had flashed up. Puzzled, I apologised to Danny and took the call. ‘Ellie? Are you all right?’

All I could hear at the other end was a baby screaming. It must be Isla.

‘Ellie?’ I could hear voices in the background. ‘Ellie, where are you?’

‘I don’t know,’ she gasped into the phone.

‘You don’tknow?’ Now I was really worried. ‘Ellie, I’m coming to get you. Just look around and tell me where you are right now.’

‘Sunnybrook. On a bench. I... wanted to go shopping and take Isla with me for the first time. But I can’t do it, Rosie. All these people. I think I’m going mad. And whatever I do, Isla just never stops crying. And I can’t tell Zak how it is because he’d never understand. Not after all we’ve been through. We were trying so long to have her but now I’m failing her every single day and she deserves so much more than me.’ She broke down in floods of tears then and I knew I had to get to her.

‘Stay right where you are, Ellie. I’m on my way.’

*****

I said a quick goodbye to Danny, and we promised we’d be in touch. Then I dived into the house, needing a quick trip to the bathroom before driving over to Ellie.

I didn’t notice it on the way in, but as I was leaving a minute later, I saw the letter lying on the mat. Quickly stuffing it into my pocket, I dashed out, all my focus now on hurrying back to Sunnybrook and Ellie.

Getting behind the wheel, I drove as fast as the speed limit would allow, hoping I’d be able to find her, still sitting on that bench on the high street with little Isla beside her in the pram.

She’d sounded really desperate, and I couldn’t help thinking –dreading– that it might be postnatal depression. It was more common than people thought and I knew all about the horrors, having suffered from a mild form of it myself after Amelie was born.

Was it the same for Ellie?

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

The Maisie Diaries

So after talking to Fergie, I’m now ABSOLUTELY SURE that Reuben did know I was asking him out, even though he pretended not to.

So, dear diary, after all the worry and the what-if-Reuben-says-yes feelings that were making me all fizzy inside with hope and excitement, I’ve now landed flat on my face.

Getting up again is going to be hard. But it serves me right for thinking a boy like Reuben would even look at someone (me) who let’s face it is only average in the looks department (and that’s on a really good day when my hair is doing what it’s supposed to).

Every time I think of facing Reuben again at rehearsals, I start sweating and I’ve nearly run out of anti-p!

I’ve decided to tell Mrs Proctor that my GP thinks I’m dangerously stressed and should avoid all exercise and dancing (high blood pressure), and that I should definitely NOT be performing in shows on stage OF ANY KIND, because the stress could actually kill me.

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