Page 112 of Duplicity

He must be a mind reader, because he takes my bottle and puts both of them down by his feet. ‘Come here. You look knackered.’ He wraps his huge arm around me and pulls me into a sideways hug against his shoulder, and I go with the flow. I allow it, because this is a bubble, and weird stuff happens in bubbles.

‘You’re a rockstar too, you know,’ he says, planting a kiss on the crown of my head. ‘You deserve some magic, too.’

I snort inelegantly to conceal my awkwardness at the very inappropriate thought I’ve just had: that a part of me would very happily spread her legs and take some of Brendan Sullivan’s particular brand of magic.

Where the hell did that come from?

Probably from the pheromones that I’m sniffing through his t-shirt—pheromones I’m all too familiar with—and from the warm solidity of his muscular body against mine, as much as from the sweetness of his words.

‘Seeing Tabs well and happy is enough magic for me,’ I say, which is the truth but possibly not the whole truth. I allow myself to nestle further into his body, because this really is very, very nice.

‘I have a confession to make, sweetheart,’ he says after a moment. His voice sounds strained. Reluctantly I ease myself out of his grasp so I can look up at him.

‘You have the entire cast ofHamiltoncoming in tomorrow?’

‘No, thank fuck.’ He pauses. ‘But I want to make my intentions clear so you can’t try to claim down the line that I pulled the wool over your eyes.’

Intentions?How very Mr Darcy of him. My poor, bruised heart gives a little thump. ‘Okay…’

‘I told you I’m not going to lay a finger on you at work. That’s because I want a clean break from the kind of relationship we had before.’ He blows out a breath. ‘And that’s because I want adifferentkind of relationship with you.’

Thump, thump, thump goes my heart, like Daniel the Spaniel’s tail on the floor when he’s waiting for a treat. Brendan reaches down and takes hold of my hand, and I don’t know why the warmth of his huge hand around my smaller one feels so life-affirming, but it does.

He smiles at me, but it’s not cocky or expectant. It’s pleading. Apprehensive. ‘I’m not going to tell you how I feel just yet, because I’ve done such a shitty job of showing you so far. But remember how it was in my bed after we played the piano?’

I nod wordlessly.

‘That’s how I feel. But you don’t have enough datapoints yet, you just have a few moments of me not behaving like an absolute dick. So I’m going to give you more, a lot more, because I want a future with you, love. And with your permission, I’d like to spend time with Tabs too when we get back. I want to get to know her better and prove to you that I’m worthy of giving you both the future you deserve.’

I’m so overcome, so moved by his beautiful words and halting delivery and intently burning eyes, that I barely know where to begin. The enormity of what he’s pledging is so hardto comprehend. Yes, he’s here, and yes, he’s been fantastic with Tabby. But if I understand him correctly, he wants a futurewith me and my daughter.He’s not asking me to take a chance on him. He’s askingusto take a chance on him.

‘Bren,’ I murmur. ‘I don’t know what?—’

He drops his forehead to mine. ‘Please don’t say anything,’ he begs. ‘Don’t write me off before I’ve had a chance to prove it to the two of you. There are no shortcuts here, I know that. But I promise I’ll put the work in, because it won’t even feel like work. It’ll feel like a privilege. I know how I feel about you, love, but I know you’d never let a man in if you weren’t completely convinced that he’d make a good father figure to Tabs. And quite right, too.

‘But I know what I want, and what I want is to give the two of you everything you deserve. Forever. So please, just give me a chance.’

I want to believe him. After all, it’s a hell of a sales pitch. It’s every single mother’s dream to have a beautiful man tell her he wants to carry her and her child off into the sunset, to make all their problems go away.

But he told me in my first audition at the club that he was a hell of a salesman. That he could close anyone.

Only time will tell if he can come up with the goods to back up these pretty promises.

CHAPTER 53

Brendan

Ifeel like a schoolboy as I sit in my office waiting for Marlowe to show up. I wanted to get in before her today, on this first day of our “new normal”. I’ve made an effort. I’m wearing a tie today, a favourite sky blue Hermès one with dolphins on it that far too many women have told me makes my eyes pop.

I’m nervous, and I’m not sure why. I suspect it’s because I’m worried about fucking up. Not only is this a big change from the past week we’ve spent together in North Carolina, but it’s a huge shift from our previous office dynamic.

I’d gauge her reaction to my impassioned speech the other day in the hospital as “hopeful but seriously fucking dubious”. I’d like to think she has feelings for me, but those feelings come way, way below her concern for Tabby’s welfare and have been badly tarnished by my behaviour.

The way I see it, it’s my job to show her that her welfare and that of her daughter are entwined. That what’s good for Tabby will also be good for her.

It’s a tall order.

Oh, shit. She’s here, and she’s wearing that white sleeveless dress I love so much. I watch like a lovesick fool as she dumps her bag and indulges in a big, messy hug with Elaine. Yeah, yeah.I’m glad Elaine’s in her corner, but I would really like her to just get her arse in here and come give me some attention. Elaine didn’t drop everything and fly out to the US to be with her, after all.

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