Page 18 of Bite Your Tongue

Iattempt to pretend like I don’t know Gemma is throwing me a going-away party, but I’m, like, ninety percent sure that’s where we’re going. Number one, Gemma doesn’t go to bars, especially not this bar that my hospital friends frequent. And two, she’s not wearing leggings, but instead a pair of jeans. That right there is a dead-ass giveaway that this bitch has something up her sleeve.

She took the news of me moving better than I’d thought, even though I know she is beyond pissed about having to move in with my brother tomorrow. Being around her the past few weeks since she’s been home has been just like old times, and I hate that I’m leaving her when she’s clearly still healing from the trauma with her ex.

“So, we’re just … going in here for a drink?” I say as we walk down the lit sidewalk.

“Yep,” she answers quickly. “Just to celebrate you going off to be a rock star tomorrow.” She turns her head toward me. “But if you go to South Carolina, get cast onSouthern Charm, and then ditch me, I’m going to be pissed.”

“I don’t think I have enough drama to be cast onSouthern Charm,” I admit. “And I can’t sew for shit to make pillows either.”

“Good,” she tosses back with a giggle just as we stop outside the pub door.

Reaching out, she bites her lip nervously before pulling it open.

“After you.” She grins, nodding her chin toward the open door.

The look on her face tells me she knows that I know, and yet neither of us says anything. Instead, I walk inside, and even though I knew that she had likely put together a going-away party, I didn’t expect this many people to show up.

When I look around, I see my fellow nurses, medical assistants, radiologists, and even a few doctors. Including the one we call McDreamy, who is drop-dead gorgeous with a smile that makes me feel like I need to change my panties every time he flashes it my way. There are even some Bay Sharks here with my brother, which is good and all, until I see Ryder next to Smith.

I instantly panic, thinking that Ryder spilled the beans and told my brother about our night together. My eyes narrow for a split second before I relax and plaster on a smile and turn toward Gem.

I throw my arms around Gemma’s shoulders. “You bitch! You planned a surprise party? We hate surprises!” I talk like I had no idea, even though we both know damn well I did.

She gives me an amused look, seeing right through my bullshit. “No, Sails. I hate surprises; you secretly love them.”

My grin widens, and I roll my eyes to the ceiling. “Guilty,” I singsong because … she’s right.

Gemma is my friend who can walk into a room and have every eye on her, just because she’s that gorgeous, and she has no clue. However, once she realizes everyone is staring at her, she’ll want to get the hell out of there because she despises being the center of attention.

Me? As embarrassing as it is to admit, I thrive on attention. I love to make people laugh and smile because it makes me feel less alone.

Pathetic, I know.

Then again, ever since I found out about the sex video, I hate even the thought of being the center of attention. Rowan took that from me. Maybe that’s not a bad thing though. Some of the guys I’ve dated said it was obnoxious. They said they preferred quiet, sweet women.

More like … boring women who probably don’t even know how to suck a dick correctly.

She gives me a squeeze before winking. “Go celebrate, sister. Tonight is about you.”

Suddenly, I’m choked up. “Are you going to be okay?” I say the words, and I’m not just talking about this party, but about everything in general.

She’s been through so much, and now, I’m about to leave her.

“I’ll be fine,” she assures me. “If I can’t socialize for a few measly hours of my life for my best friend, then we have a problem. I’m okay. Go visit with all these people who came out just for you.”

My eyes fill with tears. “I love you,” I whisper, pressing a kiss to her cheek. “I’m going to go now before I turn into a little bitch, crying at my own party.”

Backing away, I carefully wipe my eyes so as not to smudge my makeup and disappear into the crowd, feeling my heart squeeze because I’m not ready to leave Gem behind so quickly after getting her back in my life.

She might not be blood, but she might as well be because I consider her family.

The sadness is soon forced from my body because every single person who is here is moving toward me, all to pull me in for a hug or offer a drink. This party is supposed to celebrate me leaving Portland behind, but seeing all the faces in here is undoubtedly going to make it harder for me to leave tomorrow. Everyone in the hospital oddly became my family, and the hospital … my home.

I’m about to head off for the great unknown, and fake smile or not … I’m scared.

The bar is loud, and if I didn’t already know there were a ton of chicks here, the music choice would give it away—because who else would play this much Morgan Wallen?

Smith invited a few other teammates, but most have left now that the party is starting to die down. This whole night, I’ve kept my eyes on Saylor as much as I could without looking sketchy because she’d waste no time marching over and telling me I was creepy or something—I know that’s exactly what she’d do.

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