"If you wait for the perfect moment, you'll be waiting forever," Reece said sagely, twirling the straw in her drink.
"It's not just that," I admitted, the alcohol making me braver. "I'm scared."
"Of what?" Delaney asked softly.
I took a deep breath. "Of ruining it. Of not being enough. Of him waking up one day and realizing that I'm just... me. Broke, chaotic, artistically blocked me."
"Oh, honey," Delaney reached across the table and squeezed my hand. "Xander adores you. Anyone with eyes can see that."
"And the chaos is part of your charm," Emma added with a grin. "It was what drew me to you in the first place. Besides, I was dealing with a new shipment at the counter the other day and I heard Marianne telling Mrs Prescott that Xander never shuts up about you at work, and he can’t get out of there quick enough to get back to you."
"Really?" I couldn't stop the hopeful note in my voice.
"Really," Reece confirmed. "That man is head over heels. I'd bet Booker's ranch on it."
I felt a smile tugging at the corners of my mouth. "I mean, he's pretty amazing with Amelia. Sometimes I watch him with her and I just..." I trailed off, unable to articulate the swell of emotions I felt in those moments.
"Go as slow as you need to feel comfortable," Delaney said, absentmindedly rubbing her baby bump. “Just don’t go so slow that you end up stopping and regretting it.”
Delaney was always the one who saw right through to the heart of what troubled me.
I shook my head. "Why can’t this be easy?"
"Love rarely is," Emma mused, then smiled apologetically when I gave her a startled look. "Sorry, did I say the L-word too soon?"
Had she? The thought had been circling my mind for weeks now, but I'd been too afraid to acknowledge it, even to myself. Did I love Xander? The answer rose up from somewhere deep inside me, clear and terrifying: Yes. Yes, I did.
"Oh god," I groaned, letting my head thunk against the table. "I'm in love with him."
The table erupted in cheers again, drawing more looks from nearby patrons.
"Can we please keep my emotional crisis to a moderate volume?" I pleaded, though I couldn't help but laugh.
"This calls for shots," Reece declared, already signaling the bartender.
"No, no, no," I protested. "I am a responsible mother now. I cannot come home drunk to my fake fiancé while he's watching our—I mean, my—baby."
But my protests fell on deaf ears as a tray of tequila shots appeared at our table. I checked my phone again—still nothing from Xander. No news was good news, right?
"One shot," Delaney insisted, pushing one toward me, while discreetly asking the server for water for herself. "To celebrate your emotional growth."
We clinked glasses and I threw back my shot as Delaney delicately sipped her ice water. The tequila burned down my throat, warming me from the inside out.
"So what are you going to do now?" Emma asked, her expression sincere.
"Absolutely nothing," I declared. "At least not yet. We've got enough going on without me throwing emotional confessions into the mix."
"Coward," Reece teased.
"Pragmatist," I corrected. "Besides, what if he doesn't feel the same way?"
All three women gave me identical looks of exasperation.
"Enough about my love life," I declared, desperate to change the subject. "What's happening with everyone else? Delaney, how are the wedding plans coming along now that you've postponed until after the baby?"
Delaney brightened. "Actually, Trace and I have been discussing a Christmas ceremony. The colors will be gorgeous, and this little one will be old enough to participate." She smiled down at her bump. "We're thinking about a small ceremony at the ranch, nothing too elaborate."
"That sounds perfect," I said genuinely. "And the baby's room? Last time I saw it, Trace was still arguing about which shade of yellow was 'too aggressive.'"