Page 81 of Tight End

God, he’s so fucking hot.

I clench my fingers tight.

Dammit. Why can’t I feel the same fluttery sensation in my belly when I look at Jack?

Why does it have to be reserved for Brixton?

After allowing a quick glance at his profile, I make a mental list of the reasons why we’d crash and burn.

The biggest one is that he’s an emotional train wreck. Yeah,he’s all in now to make himself better and create some stability in his life, but I don’t even know what put him over the top in the first place.

Was it just the death of his brother or something more? Something deeper?

And does he even know what it is?

Every day I’d wonder when he might snap again and go off the rails.

Because that’s what happens when you don’t fix the root cause of your problems.

Brixton is doing all the right things from an outsider’s point of view. But what’s going on in his head? In his heart?

I just can’t open myself up to that kind of risk, no matter how much I like him.

Like him.

Maybe more than like him.

I suck in a breath and tear my eyes away, focusing on the buildings buzzing by as Brixton drives.

There’s so much I want to say, so many questions I want to ask. But for as open as he is sometimes, other times, most times really, he is completely shut off to the world. Like he doesn’t want anyone to see his deepest pain and his darkest secret.

Not even me.

And I can’t risk my heart on maybes and sometimes.

I need certainty and always.

Brixton doesn’t know the meanings of those words.

“So, Chase told me all about your idea for the kids at the hospital,” I say, trying to force a mental detour with my thoughts. “I think it’s amazing.”

I turn to look at him. His smile practically reaches his ears and my heart jumps.

“I told the guys at the label about it,” he says. “Andsuggested that we do kind of an impromptu secret acoustic concert for the kids. Have some other bands join in the fun when they’re in town.”

My jaw drops. “That’s fucking brilliant.”

“Yeah, I thought so.” He laughs. “It’s for a great cause. I don’t give a damn about promo or image, though. I told them I was gonna do it whether or not they wanted to join in.”

Brixton brakes at a light and turns to look at me. “This is to make the kids happy. To do a good thing for people who need it. It’s not for money or publicity or any of that crap. I’m going over to the hospital tomorrow to talk to the administrators about it. Chase sent me a text after he set up the meeting.”

“That’s really great. I’m happy for you.”

It’s really hard to believe that the guy who was beating the shit out of that biker douchebag is the one sitting next to me now. I want so badly to believe that this guy is here to stay.

I just can’t.

Fucking rabbit hole.

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