Page 74 of Go Deep

“What happened? Does your dad know?” Gabe bends to pick up my shirt and hands it to me.

I snatch it out of his hands and tug it on. “He knows. Bob knows. The whole fucking world knows.”

Gabe’s eyebrows knit together. “But you were going to tell him.”

I throw my hands into the air. “On my terms, not the fucking media’s. Now instead of having a logical conversation, I need to defend myself and my actions.”

“Defend them how? You’re in love, right? Isn’t that what you told me? That you can’t be without me?”

I rake a hand through my hair and slide my feet into my shoes, averting my gaze because I know if I look at him, it will kill me. “I know what I said. And I meant it.”

“Then why do you look like your world is crumbling?”

With a shuddering sigh, I finally look at Gabe. “Because it has. And now I have to figure out how to pull all the pieces together without my father dropping dead from another heart attack.”

“You know, you’re not the only one who this impacts, right? This is my life, too. Just because I’m out, it doesn’t meanI’m free from criticism. You’re associated with a known homophobe, one with a big damn platform. I was an inspiration to the queer community when I came out, and now it looks like I’m betraying them by being withyou. This could have a massive impact on my career, too.”

“So maybe neither one of us thought things through all that well before we fucked.”

Gabe’s stricken look makes my stomach wrench.

There I go, reverting to my classic defense mechanism to drive someone away.

Dick.I am such a fucking insensitive dick.

Shaking my head, I reach for the door handle. “Look, I know you want me to say more, but I have to get to my father’s office and find out what kind of a shit show I’m about to star in.”

“I can’t believe I thought we’d actually have a shot this time.” The anger in his voice makes the hairs on the back of my neck spring up. His words make me wince. “You really are a selfish, self-centered bastard. Always thinking about yourself.”

My throat is so damn tight, I can barely pull in a breath. Gabe doesn’t come after me. I know he wanted me to reassure him that no matter what, we could face this together. Maybe he needed to hear that because he feels like he’s not exactly on solid ground, either.

Instead, I kicked him while he was down. Again.

And this time I’m paying a very steep price for my arrogance.

“We’re both thinking about ourselves, aren’t we?” I narrow my eyes at Gabe. “We both have a lot to lose.”

“Yeah, but I thought we’d be able to handle it together. That’s what love means, sacrificing for the other and being supportive of the other.” Fury bubbles in his gaze. “But you only loveyou. Thanks for making that really fucking clear forme, since I’m obviously slow on the uptake.” He picks up my jacket and throws it at me. “Get out. And good luck with your life. I’ll enjoy my front row seat at the shit show.”

I grit my teeth and pull open the door, stalking out without another word. Any of the ones I could say would hurt him worse than I’ve already done.

Pausing outside his door, I press my hand to it. For a split second, I have the urge to knock so I can see him one more time and tell him that everything will be okay, thatwe’llbe okay. But I know what a media circus this could turn out to be, and if I did say anything to comfort him, it’d be a lie.

The drive to my father’s office is only about twenty minutes, but it feels like a lifetime has passed before I pull into the parking lot and slide into an empty spot. I clench the leather steering wheel when Bob’s gleaming silver Mercedes comes into view. It’s a good thing my car is turned off because my foot is itching to slam on the gas and plow into the fucking pompous ass car.

My pulse thrums against my throat as I walk toward the double glass doors. With a tight smile at the security guards, I walk past and head straight for the elevator bank. Stares burn my back with every step I take, and it’s clear the news has already broken.

I don’t exchange looks with anyone getting off the elevator when it finally opens. Thankfully, there isn’t anyone waiting with me. I step into the large silver car and the doors creak closed. I stab the close door button over and over until the elevator finally moves.

When the doors open on my father’s floor, a shock of pain shoots down my left arm. Jesus, not now. Not me too.

I take a deep breath before stepping into the hallway outside my dad’s office. It’s shockingly quiet save forthe Muzak pumping through the speakers. I pull open the office door and walk inside, but there isn’t anyone in reception.

Strange.

The place is empty but...

I strain my ears.

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