Page 69 of Go Deep

Eva leans forward and laces her fingers together. “Nobody ever said this would be easy.”

“Oh, so you want me to give Dad another heart attack?”

“Don’t be so dramatic. Gay marriage isn’t the whole of his platform. You’re his son above all else.”

“I don’t know if he realizes that.” I scrub a hand down the front of my face. “But there’s more to it, E. That fuckhead Bob Sinclair has basically been bullying me, making threats about what he’ll do to my company if I don’t toe the line with Dad. And he pulled the same shit with Gabe, too, after the co-hosting gig. Made threats against him, told him to stay away from me and the company because of how it might look to clients.”

“That bastard.” Eva’s eyes widen and she throws her pen on the table. “He’s got some fucking pair of balls doing that.”

“No kidding. He’s king of the homophobes. And now Carolyn is all over my ass to jump on the campaign trail. Gays are gonna hate me if I go, everyone else will hate me if I don’t.”

“But you don’t really care about everyone else, do you?”

A deep sigh slips from my lips. “No. I don’t give a damn about them. And I’m starting to give a hell of a lot less of a damn about the company. If people want to walk, let them go with Bob. I’m tired of living according to all these fucking rules. Be this person, work with these people, appear in these places. Fuck that shit.” I reach into her little sand box and grab a fistful, watching it slip through my fingers.

“The idea behind that is to drag the mini rake through the sand to soothe yourself. Not fist it with all of your repressed anger.”

I look at her and open my hand, the rest of the sand falling into the box and around the outside of it.

She shakes her head. “What have we learned here today, Vincent?”

“That you might actually be worth your astronomical fee.” I manage a half-smirk.

“Like you should talk.”

“Hey, I’ve taken very good care of your money.” I waggle my eyebrows at her. “Maybe you wanna cash out and give your money to Bob and his new financial management company of raging idiots who probably don’t know a yen from a ruble.”

“What I really want is for you to make a decision. Don’t worry about Bob or Dad. If Gabe cares about you the way I think he does, he’ll be patient and wait until you’re ready to deal with everyone else. But don’t let him slip through your fingers like that sand. Hold tight. It doesn’t come along often…or for everyone.”

I think about her words the whole half an hour it takes me to drive to Gabe’s house. His pained expression is burned into my memory, and every time it flashes before my eyes, I get a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach.

It’s been days since I last saw him. What if he doesn’t even want to talk to me? What if he doesn’t answer the door?

I wouldn’t blame him. I was an insensitive jackass. And I doubt he’ll care if my excuse was that I was petrified to death of what it all meant…and how much it means. His brownstone comes into view and my chest tightens. I maneuver my Audi R8 into what has to be the tightest parking spot on the street. With a pulse that hammers with the force of a fist, I run up the short flight of stairs and stab the doorbell.

Seconds drag by, stretching into what feels like hours before he finally pulls open the door.

A chill licks at the hairs on the back of my neck under his disdainful stare. “What do you want?”

“To talk. Can I come in?”

He lifts an eyebrow. “Why? Are you afraid someone might see you here and start a smear campaign?”

“I don’t give a fuck if they do.”

“Liar,” he sneers.

I throw my hands into the air and let out a frustrated sigh. “Fine, then I’ll just stand here and tell you that I’m a total douchebag for what I did to you the other day. And that it was because I’m scared of how I feel about you, and because I don’t know how to handle these kinds of emotions because I’ve never felt them before, for a guy or a girl.”

Gabe folds his arms over his chest and lounges against the door. “Can we go back to the douchebag part?”

I roll my eyes. “Do you realize how hard this is for me? Putting myself out there like this?”

“Uh, yeah, because I did the exact same thing,” he snaps. “I know how much it sucks to let it all out and then get doors slammed in your face because you gave people more credit than they ever deserved.”

My shoulders slump. “It was so wrong to do that to you.”

Gabe looks at me for a long minute and opens the door fully, nodding his head behind him. “Come on.”

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