Page 64 of Saving Noah

Chapter 16

Zach clipped the leash on Denala’s collar and slipped his feet into his running shoes. He couldn’t do this any longer. He couldn’t just sit in his apartment and wait for news about Noah’s disappearance to fall into his lap. Twenty-four hours. Twenty-four hours since anyone had seen or heard from Noah. The FBI had given them zero information but finally confirmed they didn’t know Noah’s whereabouts either. Cameron Maverick was dead by a not-so-apparent suicide. The FBI didn’t believe he’d jumped from his penthouse balcony and neither did Zach. He’d been pushed or thrown. Zach supposed it didn’t matter either way. He was part of the Moretti cleanup. Because the FBI was mute, he and Connor didn’t have a clue to what extent Cameron had been “dirty” when it came to Noah, but he’d beeninvolvedwith Moretti.

Mack in security hadn’t been a cleanup; he’d just been in the wrong place at the wrong time. Whoever tampered with the security video and backup had been forced to get rid of Mack in the process. Connor thought Mack must have either walked in on them when they were tampering with the computers or killed him in a blitz attack while he sat at his station. Either way, Mack, husband and father of three, was dead, and there wasn’t a hint of evidence left behind. The last security video was from a month back.

“Where do you think you’re going?” Connor asked when he looked up from his computer to see Zach headed out the door with Denala. “Nuh-uh, Zach. You aren’t going anywhere by yourself. Until we know who we’re dealing with, you aren’t going to be alone. End of story.”

Zach sighed wearily. He was too mentally drained and emotionally ruined to argue with Connor. “I don’t need a babysitter, Conn. More than anything, I need you working on finding Noah, and if you’re taking Denala out for a bathroom break, you aren’t researching Dante Moretti. You stay. I’ll be fine. I’m only taking her across the street to the dog park.” Hell, Zach hoped Dante,ifhe was the Moretti responsible for the clusterfuck currently taking place, would come after him.

“No, Zach. I’m not kidding. These people are dangerous,” Connor argued as he started logging off his computer.

“Why don’t I go with Zach and you stay and work on figuring out if Dante is our guy, and if he is, where he might be holding Noah,” Wayne suggested. He got up and squeezed Connor’s shoulder, letting him know he’d take care of Zach. “You find a way to bring Zach’s boy back home.”

“I don’t feel one damned bit better with you going with Zach,” Connor argued. “I can’t lose you both.”

“Argue with each other all you want. I’ll be back before you two settle anything. I need to get out of here,” Zach said. “Everywhere I look…”

“I’ll take care of him, babe,” Wayne promised as he hustled out the door after Zach. Out in the hall, he told Zach, “He blames himself for Noah being gone.” When Zach pushed the elevator button and ignored Wayne, the man continued, “Do you blame him, Zach? Do you somehow think all this is Connor’s fault?”

The doors slid open, and Zach struggled to get Denala inside the elevator. She whined, dug her paws in and tried to pull him toward the stairwell. “Denala! Come,” Zach ordered as he tugged harder while Wayne held the elevator doors open for them.

“Is she always skittish of the elevator?”

“No. Never before Noah disappeared,” Zach answered as he finally forced her inside the elevator car. “She acted the same way this morning. I’m scared to death something happened to him on this elevator and that’s why she doesn’t want to get on it.” Zach’s eyes searched the small compartment, looking for any sign of foul play. Nothing.

“Do you blame him, Zach?” Wayne asked quietly as he stroked Denala’s head. She continued whining.

“Blame Connor? No, of course not. I said that shit because I was terrified. Still am. Connor would give his life protecting a stranger so I don’t harbor any doubts he’d do the same for Noah. He loved Noah because he was mine and because Noah’s so damned lovable.”

“When you can, make sure Connor knows that. He’s suffering, too.”

The elevator grew silent except for Denala’s whining. Finally, Zach said, “I don’t trust you.”

“I know.”

Forty-eight hours. Forty-eight hours of pure hell since anybody had seen Noah. Oddly enough, the FBI kept them in the loop fairly well. No, they didn’t have any leads or hopes of digging up any leads, but they were at least talking to Connor on a regular basis. Like Connor, they believed Dante Moretti was behind Noah’s disappearance and probably his own father’s death, but since nobody had a clue where the younger Moretti was hiding, there wasn’t a damned thing they could do with their suspicions.

Connor was gone more than he was at Zach’s apartment, but he always left Wayne behind to watch over Zach. Zach didn’t have the heart to tell his best friend he didn’t trust his lover any further than he could throw him. If he was perfectly honest with himself, he’d admit he hoped Wayne was somehow involved and they planned to take him, as well. That was what he hoped. In reality, Wayne kept his distance, but watched over Zach at all times. When they were alone in the apartment, he made himself as invisible as possible, but Zach noted the other man was always on the phone…with somebody. Most of the time, it was Connor.Most of the time.

Wayne was hiding something, and Zach had a feeling Connor knew what it was. It wasn’t like his friend to be so trusting, especially when Wayne sent out signals right and left that something wasn’t quite right. Zach wasn’t the investigator Connor was, but he’d called some friends at the hospital and they’d found out Wayne’s credentials were legit and there wasn’t any criminal history documented in his employee file. By all appearances, he was exactly who he claimed to be. Appearances could be deceiving, though. Zach knew this because of his own life.

So, he maintained his distance and kept an eye on the other man. Denala liked him, so that was one mark in the good column. That meant Wayne had exactly two pluses: Denala and Connor liked him. End of story.

As the hours turned into days, his best friend no longer thought Noah was alive. He wouldn’t say it out loud, but his eyes spoke volumes. The sadness. The pity. The anger. The promise of revenge. The bottom line, there were only two options where Noah was concerned: either the FBI had moved him and every word coming from them was nothing more than a lie intended to protect Noah, or Dante had him and he was dead. That was an option Zach couldn’t fathom. He would know, wouldn’t he? An emptiness would have crept into the space where Noah resided. Surely, he’d have felt it the moment Noah’s heart stopped beating.

Thinking things like that was bullshit, but it was all Zach had. The stages of grief called it denial—he called it survival. If lying to himself was what it took, lying was what he’d do. He’d keep telling himself Noah was out there, protected by the FBI, and one day he’d see him again.

Was he safe? Was he terrified? He’d made great progress over the past month, but he was nowhere near being comfortable with being ripped from everything he considered safe. The mental suffering Noah had to be enduring nearly crippled Zach with pain. Why couldn’t they have let him go with him? Why couldn’t he have had one more day…one more minute? One more chance to tell Noah he loved him.

The door to his apartment opened, and Zach nearly jumped out of his skin. Connor walked through, the same look of despair in his eyes was there when he’d left earlier that morning. Nothing. They’d found out nothing that would help them find Noah. To confirm, Connor shook his head, and then went down the hall in search of Wayne. Zach knew it hurt Connor to face him; Connor blamed himself for not being able to help Noah when he’d needed it. But Zach was the main source of that blame, with all the shit he’d spouted at Conn when he’d come home to find Noah missing. If he could take it back, he would, but his words would always be there between them.

With a sigh of frustration, he grabbed Denala’s leash, motioned for his dog to come to him, and snuck out of the apartment before Connor came back down the hall. Wayne and Connor were always whispering secrets to one another, so giving them privacy seemed like a straight-up thing to do…plus, he needed some time to himself, and Connor would never agree to let him out of the apartment alone. He’d also had another stupid thought earlier and wanted the chance to give it a try, without anybody else watching.

He fought Denala to get her on the elevator and then fought with her to get her across the lobby and out the front doors. It was their new thing. She’d never been disobedient to him before, so in his heart, he knew it was because she didn’t want to leave the apartment; she was waiting on Noah to return. Once outside, she whined softly but then settled down and followed him across the street to the dog park. He wouldn’t have long before either Connor or Wayne came rushing after him, so he enjoyed the peace while he could. Once inside the park, he sat on a bench and turned Denala loose to run. She whimpered then scampered to the nearest poop section to do her business. In less than two minutes, she was back at his side, whimpering again. He grabbed one of the poop bags, scooped up her business, disposed of it, and then returned to the bench. She rested her head on his knee and watched him.

“I know, girl. I miss him, too.” He stroked her head as he talked. “He misses us, too. It’ll be all right. He’ll be back,” he lied. She cocked her head and looked at him like she wanted to tell him something. Feeling like an idiot, he reached into his pocket and pulled out one of Noah’s T-shirts. He put it against Denala’s nose and said, “Search, Denala. Find Noah.” It was the same command they’d used in her training classes…the command she’d never shown any interest in following. He’d told himself she was capable, she just hadn’twantedto find what the trainers tried to get her to locate. She wanted Noah.

She sniffed the shirt, stood, and put her nose to the ground, whimpering and growling with excitement. Zach’s heart started racing. He’d known she could do it. Quickly, he snapped on her leash and led her to the park exit. Some of his enthusiasm dissipated when he saw Wayne waiting on him, a sad frown on his face.

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