I snorted.
“I…you…brought such peace and joy to our home,” he continued as if I hadn’t just rained on his pity me/praise Elysa party. “Do you know that since you left, I can’t stay in the flat?”
Okay, that got my attention. “Why?”
“Because I miss you,” he said.
My vision darkened. “You manipulative son of a bitch.”
“Elysa—”
I got up and pulled out some euros from my wallet that sat in my jeans and threw it on the table. “All thisyou’re awesome, Elysabullshit is for what? Making me come for the awards thing? Are appearances so important to you?”
He looked baffled, like he couldn’t understand why I was turning on him.
“I do miss you, Elysa, and that’s the truth.” He collected the euros I’d thrown and tucked them into my jeans pocket.
I swallowed, distracted by his words and actions. “I…what are you doing to me, Dante?” I asked wearily. “Why can’t you just sign those papers and set me free?”
If I had physically kicked him, he wouldn’t have looked so hurt. I didn’t know what to make of him. One minute, he blew hot, and then he blew cold, and then got weird, and then he gotweirder.
“I’m not perfect.” He rose and put his hands on my shoulders. “I made mistakes. If you listen to me, I’d like to…tell you about them and…ask…for your forgiveness.”
Well, fuck me sideways and call me Sally.“You want me to forgive you?”
“Yes.”
“Why? Can’t we just divorce and live happily ever after…apart?”
He smiled hesitantly. “Will you give me a chance to apologize?’
“Do I have to come to Piedmont for that? Or do I have to come to Piedmont so you’ll sign the damn papers?”
He gave a short laugh. “I’ve made a mess of things, haven’t I,mi leoncina. You don’t have to do anythingbut hear me out. About the divorce…can we talk about thatafterwe talk aboutus?”
Had I been drinking too much? Did that shot of scotch go to my head? Or was I reading too much into the convoluted way in which he was talking?
“You said sex with me was boring, and Lucia was better suited to be your wife,” I reminded him.
“That is one of the mistakes I would be asking your forgiveness for.”
I gaped at him and then groaned. “This is…too much, Dante.”
“I understand. How about you think about it, and we talk again?” he suggested. “Giulia will send you all the information about the ceremony and…I hope you’ll come. It wouldn’t be right for me to receive that award without you at my side.”
Yes, I was drunk, like black-out drunk, because he was saying things I’d been dreaming he’d say to me, only he was doing it now when I’d made my peace, broken my heart, killed my dreams, and left him to be happy with that despicable woman he wanted.
“May I walk you to?—”
I shook my head. “The bistro is down the street. I…no,pleasedon’t. I want to be alone.”
“Okay, Elysa. We’ll talk soon.”
I resisted flipping him the bird and walked, a little unsteadily, to the bistro.
TWELVE
Elysa