Page 49 of Barely Breathing

But I don’t feel safe. Nothing does. Not when an innocent child’s life hangs in the balance. Not when time is running out.

“Safe? I’m not yours to keep safe, Costin.” I laugh in disbelief, the sound harsh and bitter in my throat. The predator in him is close to the surface, and despite everything, I’m aroused by it. I only partially believe what I’m saying. “I can take care of myself.”

He moves closer, moonlight catching the fresh blood on his hand. I’m not scared for myself, but from the idea that he’s been feeding. The sight of blood on his skin should repulse me. I tell myself it does. I’m too much of a coward to ask him how he ate. Or who. I am too afraid to acknowledge how the predator in him calls to something wild in me.

“What is it about this man?” Costin demands. Before I can retreat, his fingers catch my neck. They’re warm and are further proof that he’s been feeding. His eyes swirl with possessive power. I feel the jealousy radiating off of him. There is a desperation I’ve never seen before, a crack in his perfect control that makes him even more irresistible. His thumb traces over my pulse, and I hate how my body aches for his touch even as my mind screams to pull away.

I’m so used to thinking of him as strong and powerful. Now, to see the vulnerability takes me aback. The great Constantine, master of vampires, actually looks afraid.

“What is it about Paul that makes him so special?” he asks, this time more like a plea as he tries to understand.

“He saved my life. He helped me when he didn’t have to. I’ve told you all this, Costin. He should not be punished because he was kind to a stranger. His parents are hurt, his daughter’s been taken, and it’s all my fault. They’re on the supernatural’s radar because of me. They fit the requirements for this ritual because of me. If they’d never met me...” My voice breaks. “Diana would be safe at home, not being used for some werewolf ritual.”

There’s more to what I feel for Paul than gratitude. I know we both know it. I can’t help but wish he’ll leave it at that.

I am not so lucky.

“Why do you love him?” Costin’s voice drops to a dangerous whisper. He stands unnaturally still, a predator poised to strike. The blood on his hand gleams in the moonlight, a reminder of what he truly is. I wish I could read the thoughts behind those ancient eyes and translate the micro-expressions that centuries have taught him to hide. I wish,just once, I had the same power over him that he holds over me.

I want to tell him I don’t love Paul, but the lie sticks in my throat. There’s a part of me that desperately wants what Paul represents. I want normalcy, equality, and a life where I’m not constantly reminded of my mortality or treated less than because of it. In the supernatural world, being human is seen as a flaw, a weakness to be protected or exploited. But Paul... Paul never saw me that way.

I want to belong. I want to be able to hold my own without having to depend on others to take care of me. Paul saw me as an equal, not something to be controlled or sheltered. I miss that feeling.

The memory of it makes my chest ache, even as Draakmar’s restless presence reminds me I can never return to being just human. Not now. Not with an ancient dragon’s power protecting me and a child’s life hanging in the balance.

“Tell me.” Costin stares at me expectantly.

My voice chokes in my throat. The amulet burns against my skin. Draakmar senses my turmoil. Why has everything become so complicated? A few days ago, my biggest worry was avoiding Chester Freemont. Now I’m caught between a master vampire and a ritual sacrifice, with an innocent child’s life in the balance.

His fingers tighten on myneck, not enough to hurt, but enough to remind me of his inhuman strength. “Will you ever love me like you do him?”

The question carries an edge of desperation.

I don’t know what to say. I don’t allow myself to think about love with Costin. It’s too dangerous and complicated. He’s lived for centuries and will live for centuries more. I’m just a mortal, a tiny blip on his timeline that will fade in the blink of his immortal eye. The depth of my feelings for him terrifies me because I know I’ll never mean as much to him as he does to me.

I need to refocus my thoughts and resist the temptation of his eyes. With time running out for Diana, how can I think about love at all?

“If you won’t tell me. Show me,” Costin whispers, his voice dropping to that dangerous velvet tone that makes my knees weak. Crimson bleeds into his eyes like spilled wine, hypnotic and terrifying. “Show me why he matters so much to you.”

His grip tightens on my neck. Before I can react, his fangs tear into his palm. The scent of ancient vampire blood hits me. It’s powerful and intoxicating.

“No!” I try to scramble away, but supernatural speed makes resistance futile. His arm bands around my back like steel, crushing me against his chest as his bleeding palm presses against my mouth.

Draakmar’s protective presence feels distant as Costin’s blood magic takes hold.

The thick, metallic taste floods my tongue. I thrash against him, but it’s like fighting a marble statue.

“I need to understand.” His voice carries a desperate edge that scares me more than his strength. This isn’t the controlled master vampire I know. This is raw and dangerous. “Show me everything.”

The world blurs and shifts, reality bleeding away like watercolors in the rain. I try to fight his blood magic, but a riptide is pulling me under.

“No, we don’t have time for this!” I try to fight, but his blood chokes the protest back.

It’s too late. The room spins violently, and I feel myself being torn backward through time. Fragments of memory flash past like broken glass as my mind finds the right one. I see Diana’s terrified face, Paul’s gentle smile, and the vampires appearing from the shadows. I don’t want Costin to see any of this. I don’t want to relive these moments. I don’t want to feel.

The memory he’s searching for crystalizes with brutal clarity. It hits me like a physical blow, and I feel Costin’s presence watching and judging. His blood magic makes everything sharper, more vividthan I want it to be, and I’m helpless to stop it as the present dissolves…

Hotel, Downtown Kansas City, Several Months Earlier…

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