Page 81 of Mostly Shattered

Paul never asked to be brought into this supernatural world. By the time he learned that supernatural creatures are real, it was too late for him to turn back. Monsters have been tormenting him and his daughter since they met me.

“Paul,” I say. “I’m so sorry.”

He doesn’t respond. I know what is to come. I have to stop it.

If this is how the amulet fixes itself, I can’t live with that. There must be another way. I have to break this timeline.

“Conrad,” I try to plead. I rush into the living room to stand between the couch and the gun. “You don’t have to do this. It’s not going to end the way you?—”

“Don’t mind them. I told them if they moved or made a sound, I’d shoot everyone.” Conrad is still staring at where I had been standing.

I follow his gaze to find a ghostly image of my past self. I’m the only figure who’s not solid. Conrad keeps talking, but I don’t listen. I grab Paul to try to force him to look at me. My touch has no effect on him. “Paul, you have to get out of here. You have to run.”

But where can he go? Vampires are outside. He won’t stand a chance against them.

He doesn’t hear me. I try to pull Lorelai off the couch. She doesn’t respond. They’re locked in the past. I’m having no effect.

Conrad’s gun bounces between Paul and Lorelai like he’s deciding who to shoot first. I climb over the coffee table and grab the gun from his hands. I point it at him. He holds his hands out like he still carries it.

“Hey,”the ghostly echo of my past self tries to reason, the sound airy and distant.“What are wedoing here? Come on, Conrad. Look at me. It’s me. Talk to me. We’re family.”

The words distract me for a split second, and the gun disappears from my grip without me realizing it. When I look back, it has returned to Conrad.

There isn’t much time. I hurry out of the room, away from the scene. I can still hear it playing out. Desperate, I look at every reflective surface I can find. “Anthony? Costin? Can you hear me?”

I can’t find a way out.

What do I do? What do I do?

Fuck!

I end up in the kitchen. My hands shake violently as I dig through the drawers, only to grab a butcher knife. I run back into the living room, wielding the blade.

“Remember when we were little?”my past self is trying to reach Conrad. Spoiler alert: I fail.“Those nights on the balcony? Those days breaking the rules in the library? It was you and me against the supernatural world…”

I ignore my past self.

“Conrad, put the gun down,” I order.

They don’t hear me.

I try to give the knife to my past self. I won’t take it.

I go to Conrad and hesitate a second. I close myeyes and make a weak noise as I plunge the blade into his stomach. I feel the resistance as it goes in.

I wait, too afraid to look at what I’ve done.

Conrad gives a short, humorless laugh and says, “Stop being so naïve. We’re not family. We’ve never been family. Do you know what I remember? Davis shows up at the Turnblads’ house, asks to inspect the kid who had a run-in with gremlins at the group home before coming to stay with them, drops off a wad of cash, and takes me like a puppy he picked up at the pound.”

I withdraw the blade and blindly stab a second time. I feel it enter his body.

“Lady Astrid made it very clear that my only purpose was to take care ofyou,entertainyou,” Conrad continues.

I try to stab him a third time, screaming as I do so.

“Be Tamara’s brother.” Conrad keeps playing his part. “Go to school with Tamara. Take care of lonely Tamara. Watch out for Tamara. She’s gullible and easily manipulated by others. Never tell Tamara. If anything happens to Tamara, you’ll find yourself back at the pound. So, because you needed a friend, I got to spend the next decade as your babysitter. Every time you messed up or got hurt, I was punished, even as an adult.”

Just like the first time I heard them, his words hurt.

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