Page 20 of Two Weddings and a Shoot Out

“I’m going to start off by apologizing. When I first saw you on Christmas Eve, I was attracted to you, the whole package. Your strength, your compassion, and the sexiness that just exudes from you. And the attraction scared the hell out of me. I’m not saying I haven’t assuaged needs since Kathryn passed, but man, this makes me sound like an ass—they were only physical releases. It was sex. A biological need to try to feel some type of connection.

But Christmas Eve, it wasn’t even sex. It was an instant attraction and a need to get to know you better. So I did what I needed to—I ran. Flat out ran as far and as fast away as I could so that there wasn’t any threat to my quiet solitude.”

He paused, and she waited. He was finally sharing, and she was a tad scared if she said anything, he’d clam up.

“Then circumstances forced us together. At least, that’s what I told myself, but you didn’t have to stay at my house. I pushed for you and Benji to live with me. Meg and Rascal offered, along with a couple others. My house wasn’t the only option, but it was the only one I could live with.

My attraction continued to build until I couldn’t stop myself. At least, that’s what I kept telling myself when I’d be an ass in the morning, trying to convince myself it was only sex. But it wasn’t just sex. When I was with you, I could feel you peeling away each layer that I’d wrapped myself in to survive Kathryn’s loss. And it scared me. No, that’s not true. It petrified me because what if I let myself love you and you left me like Kathryn did? Would I survive a second time?”

Locks shuddered as he whispered those last words. Her heart ached for him, but once again, it was dark as the storm rolled in. Nighttime when they never had trouble expressing anything.What would happen in the cold light of day? Would he close up again and push her away?

“It’s not like I don’t worry about the same things, Locks. Giles leaving me ripped a hole in my heart, but the way you treated me, as if I was nothing, left a scar, too. I want to believe that you recognize where you went wrong, but how do I know this isn’t just, once again, you wanting me in the dark? I love our time in the dark, but it can’t be the only time. I want a man who puts me first. That shouts to the world,This is my woman, and I’ll fucking do anything for her.The man who is willing to say,I don’t know what comes next, but I want to face it with you.That man, Locks, is inside of you, but the question is, are you willing to bring that man into the light of day in front of everyone?” she said, wiping the tears off her face. She’d sworn to herself that he’d made her cry for the last time, but as soon as they started talking, the tears had come again.

But just like Bootstrap had reminded her, she deserved to be first. She was raising Benji, and what type of example would she be setting if she just accepted the scraps of a relationship?

“I’m sorry that I’ve done this to you and made you feel this way. I’m not going to try to convince you any more tonight because, like you said, it’s dark. I appreciate you taking the time to talk with me tonight. If it’s okay with you, I’ll drop you where you’re staying. I’m going to take tonight and think about how I can repair what I broke. I’d like you to take tonight and consider what you need for us to try going forward.”

Locks started the truck up and drove back to Faith’s house. The rain started as he got close. He pulled the truck around until her door was under the overhang. He turned the truck off and hopped out to open her door. She got out, and he opened the back, grabbing almost all the bags. Hope grabbed the remaining two and walked into the house. Locks brought the bags inbehind her. He immediately turned and headed for the door. She followed him and stood at the door.

“I’ll think about what we talked about,” she said. Locks nodded and then turned and ran toward his truck. The wind and rain were picking up. She closed the door and then leaned against it.

Why were relationships so hard? Was it too much to want the shining knight on a white horse to take her away from all this?

Chapter Fourteen

Maureenslidtherollsout of the oven and laid them on the counter to cool. Lunch was almost ready.

Compass had held her in his arms the last two nights since Nelson’s on Friday. This morning, she’d gotten up before he had and showered to make sure she was ready for today.

With the storm rolling through, they hadn’t gotten much sleep because tornado sirens had gone off at three in the morning. They’d gone down to the underground tunnel that connected the clubhouse to the snowplow barn. There wasn’t a basement per se, just the tunnel system for the clubhouse. If she wanted to be in a basement specifically, they could have gone to one of the houses, but it was all the same to Maureen. Any touchdown of a tornado in the county, whether it was close to any of the towns, had all of them under a tornado warning.

Once the storm had passed, the guys had checked to see if anyone was reporting damage and needed help. The tornado had touched down about fifteen miles outside of town. It had cut aswath through a wheat field and destroyed a barn. No one had been injured, so they’d gone to bed. She’d run her hands over Compass’ chest, sliding her fingers down his chest toward the waistband of his underwear.

With the lights out and the moonlight the only light shining in the window, he’d stopped her hands and brought them up to his mouth, kissed them, and put them on his chest. She’d decided not to push it and instead changed her breathing to mimic sleep. Once she’d been breathing deeply for a little bit, Compass had kissed her forehead. His words ofI love you so much, woman, and wish you loved me enough toowhispered against her forehead told her he was ready for the next steps she had planned. She’d been debating how fast she was going to push him, but considering that if it hadn’t been for her thoughtless words, they would have already been married, she imagined.

Regina walked in and nodded at her, handing her a small ring box. Because it was such short notice, she hadn’t been able to shop for a ring. When she’d been lamenting that to Regina, Dex had been close by. He said he melted metal for different things working with guns, and depending on how nice she wanted it, he could probably do something before Sunday.

“We just need to take the food in. Do you want to do it before or after lunch?” Regina asked.

“Oh my. Before. My stomach is so upset I don’t think I could eat. Does Baron know?” she asked.

“Yes, he said he’ll get you started.”

Maureen nodded. “I’m going to go run and freshen my lipstick while trying not to throw up.”

Regina hugged her. “You’ve got this.”

Maureen freshened up and got back to the main room just as everyone was sitting down. Compass was at the corner of one of the tables, and there was an empty place beside him.

“Listen up, I’m thrilled you are all here. We’ve been blessed, and War and the guys leading us into the next generation warms this old guy’s heart. Someone who is newer to Bluff Creek but has become special to us in a short amount of time has something she needs to say,” Baron said, sitting down and cocking his eyebrow at her. It was now or never.

She walked close to Compass, took a deep breath, and got down on one knee, staring at the man who’d brought so much joy into her life in such a short amount of time.

“Gideon ‘Compass’ Evans, a chance meeting at an author signing brought you into my life. I wasn’t looking for someone to spend the rest of my life with. I was just enjoying time with my daughter and hiding out from a threat.

“You and your friends immediately rode to our rescue, no questions asked and with no worry at all for yourselves. Each night you held me in your arms, I wondered how I’d gotten so lucky. Lucky to be blessed twice with love.

“Early on, you asked me a question, and because I was scared of being hurt, I flippantly answered that I couldn’t ever see myself married again. And I couldn’t because you hadn’t shown me the depth of your love and the strength of your character. Gideon ‘Compass’ Evans, I love you. Will you do me the honor of becoming my husband? The man who I look forward to spending all the rest of our years with?”

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