Page 25 of Well, That Was Unexpected

An appearance? What the hell? Can’t they see that I can barely string together two sentences under pressure? What in god’s name would make anyone think that I would be a good candidate for anything at an actualeventwith actual real-lifehumans?

But then I look over at George and his face is a picture of pure panic. He’s staring at me wide-eyed and grimacing and it’s like watching a really, really sad puppy slowly drown. I can’tnotsave the puppy. I don’t want to get him in trouble in front of these people, and definitely not in front of these cameras. Plus, Nainai is smiling and nodding at me, and nobody can possibly say no to that tiny wrinkled face. So I say, “Yeah…sure. I would love to attend an event here.”

“Here?” Rina says, frowning. “Has there been a change in the itinerary?”

“Huh?” I say.

“No,” George says quickly. “There hasn’t. The launch will goon as planned, and I guess, uh, you’ll be appearing then…in, uh, in Bali.”

Bali. The island that’s a two-hour plane ride from Jakarta. Bali. Yep. Of course. I smile at him with wild, panicky eyes. “On second thought, I don’t know that my mom would let me fly—”

“Sharlot! What’s going on?”

I look up to see Mama, Kiki, and Kiki’s parents, and honestly, this is the first time ever that I’ve felt so relieved to see Mama. So much relief, in fact, that tears rush to my eyes. For the first time in my life, I need Mama to be her overbearing self and tell me that I need to go the hell home right now. I stand up and say, “Sorry, everyone, this is my family.”

George is already on his feet, holding out his hand toward Mama. “Hi, Tante.”Tantemeans “Auntie” in Indonesian. Mama can’t possibly resist the charm of being called Tante so politely, but before she can reply, Kiki leans forward and holds out her hand to George.

“Kiki. I’m Shar’s cousin.” She glances at the camera and winks.

“Er, yep, so great that we were all able to meet,” I say. “Anyway, we’ll go and let you have some private time with, uh…with the cameras and stuff.”

I grab Kiki’s hand to yank her away—she’s already posing for the cameras. Thank you, universe, for my family being so meddlesome that they couldn’t stay away from my non-date. Thank you, thank—

“Qing Pei, is that you?”

All thought screeches out of my head. I freeze as EighthAunt gets to her feet. Her eyes aren’t on me, though. They’re on Mama, and Mama’s looking equally shell-shocked to see Eighth Aunt. The camera is clicking away like no tomorrow, and the video guy is having a hard time deciding whose face to focus on. Rina is watching all of this with unconcealed interest.

When Mama finally talks, her voice comes out small and unsure and very much unlike the strident Mama I know. “Shu Ling?”

“Yes!” Eighth Aunt cries. “Oh my goodness. Qing Pei!” She rushes forward and closes the gap between them, hugging Mama tightly. It’s not an Asian hug this time, but a real oh-boy-it’s-a-pot-of-honey-and-I’m-a-bear-type hug. A split second later, Mama gingerly hugs her back. Eighth Aunt laughs and releases her before turning to the cameras. “This is my best friend from school. Aduh, I haven’t seen you since—wah, since we were seventeen.”

Mama stiffens a little but recovers her smile valiantly. Seventeen. Huh. She had me when she was eighteen. Something inside me clicks into place, and for a moment everything else fades away. She must’ve gotten pregnant here at seventeen and then left for the States because it would’ve been a huge scandal at the time. When I look at Mama again, I see her in a slightly different light. She’d left her homeland, her family, and her best friend who she was obviously close to. It must have been heartbreaking. I’m only here for the summer and already I miss everyone back home in LA with a fierce ache I can’t get over.

Mama seems to have gotten over the slight hiccup, and she and Eighth Aunt are now getting equally flappy and excitedabout how amazing it is to be reunited after all these years. Li Jiujiu laughs and tells Nainai that Mama and Eighth Aunt used to be mistaken for sisters because they wore their hair exactly the same way as each other and insisted on wearing identical outfits.

“That is so sweet!” Rina says. “And now your daughter is seeing her nephew. What are the chances?”

All eyes and lenses are suddenly on me and George. “Uh…” I’m not quite sure which of us is uh-ing. Both. Both of us are.

George, who’s probably had a ton more practice in the spotlight, manages to recover first and go, “Ha-ha, yeah, what are the chances?”

“This feels like fate,” Kiki says with a grin. I shoot her a glare, which she deflects with an innocent smile.

“This really does feel like fate!” Eighth Aunt cries. She’s linked her arm through Mama’s and can’t stop grinning at her. “You know, we were just talking about having Sharlot give a speech at our event in Bali—oh yes, we’re having an event in Bali next week—please come, Qing Pei. Now that I finally have you back in Indonesia, we must catch up. We must!”

Mama’s eyes are wide. My insides roil.Say no, Mama. You’ve said no my entire life. It’s been a series of nos. And now is the time I really need you to say no.

She opens her mouth.

“Of course, we’d be delighted to.”

Aw, fuck.

The night after my disastrous meeting with Sharlot, I confide privately to Eighth Aunt about what a bad idea it is to have Sharlot join us in Bali because catfishing, fake girlfriend, etc. In my defense, I’d foolishly hoped that Eighth Aunt would be empathetic and tell me she’d handle it the same way she handles every other crisis the family manages to come up with every week.

But now here she is, gaping at me with such a look of horror and disappointment that my balls are shriveling up and trying to climb back into my body.

“Because catfishing?” she says softly.

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