Page 75 of Never Ever Getting Back Together

I wince, and turn to him with what I hope is a look of flattered adoration. “Mm!”

“Also, get ready. I have one more surprise for you.”

I give him a questioning look, then I realize the lead singer of Two Seater, Someone Someone No-Idea-What-His-Name-Is, is still talking to the crowd. Oh, god, Jordy’s given him a sappy message to give to me, hasn’t he?

“… we actually have some special guests here, tonight. Which ladies in the crowd can say they’ve ever wanted to date a prince?”

The crowd loses its mind.

Gwendolyn wrote this script for him, forsure.

“Well, one lucky girl has come pretty darn close.”

Isaac taps me on the shoulder, and gives me what looks like a folded blue sheet. I shake it out, and see orange and green stripes, and a white triangle. It’s the Chalonian flag.

“She’s dating Jordy Miller, who you might recognize as themightyhandsome younger brother of Princess Samantha.”

Jordy takes the flag and drapes it around my back like a cape. “Hold onto it, like this.”

“Jordy, wha—”

“Give it up for our temporary backup dancer, Maya Bailey!”

Jordy shoves me, and I shriek and grab a nearby pole. “No. No!”

“Go on, it’s your moment.”

“I don’t want a moment. I never asked for a single moment!”

“I believe in you! Face that stage fright head on!”

“No!”

“And out—”

“Jordy!”

“You—”

“Please, please, please don’t—”

“Go!”

Gwendolyn helpfully pries my fingers from the pole and Jordy shoves me once again. Somebody Who-the-Hell walks to the side of the stage and holds his hand out,winkingat me. “Care to join me, Maya?” he asks.

No, I absolutely donotfucking care to join him. The question here is, do I have any way out of this that won’t result in me being the bad-guy buzzkill?

No. No, I do not.

About as enthusiastically as a royal headed to the guillotine, I take Somebody McWhat’s-His-Face’s hand and follow him onto the stage as the crowd roars. I squint out over the crowd, my heart hammering so hard I might pass out live onstage. Up here, the lights are blinding, burning white and fluorescent into my eyeballs. It’s also approximately a thousand degrees, so, good thing I’m dressed for exertion, I guess.

It’s also really great that I’m currently onstage in a ponytail and sports bra. Yeah. Really love this turn of events for me.

Somebody Never-Heard-of-Him goes back to the microphone. “Why don’t you hold out that flag, Maya? Show the crowd what you’ve got there.”

I hold it out, and the roar shakes the stage.

A guitar riff rings out, and, suddenly, the next song is underway. I glance side-stage in a panic and take a step toward it, but Isaac, Jordy, and Gwendolyn all frantically gesture at me to dance. At least, I think that’s what’s happening. Jordy’s waving his fists around in front of his face, Gwendolyn’s doing what I think is the Macarena, and Isaac’s shimmying from side to side.

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