Page 68 of Perfect on Paper

How had I missed this?

I didn’t dare look back as I ran. I didn’t know if Brougham was following me, or if he was still standing, stunned, by his car. I didn’t know which thought was worse, so I didn’t, I didn’t think of him, I didn’t.

My eyes burned with tears as I pushed through the double doors into the school hallway. It was deserted. Not a person in sight. I power-walked along the linoleum floor, putting as much distance between Brougham and me as I could.

I didn’t want to see Mom. I didn’t want her to know, to look at Brougham differently, to form an opinion on all of this. Not when she didn’t know the full story.

With shaking hands, I pulled out my phone and went straight to Ainsley’s contact name. Somehow managed to press call.

Pick up, pick up, pick up.

Did this mean Brougham liked me? What if he did, and he’d kissed me, and I’d run away from him? Literally run from him, the way he was always terrified everyone would do. Maybe I—

Ainsley answered in a bright voice. “Hello?”

“Hey,”I said. “Are you in class?”

“I’m just walking out now—wait, what’s wrong?”

“Can you please pick me up from school? Now? Now now? As quickly as you can?”

“Yeah, of course. Are you okay?”

“Um, yeah, no, not really, kind of. I’m safe. Something happened. I need to talk. But I need to get out of here. Now.”

“Meet me in the parking lot. I’ll come right now.”

I got to the front doors and peeked out into the parking lot. It was deserted. Brougham was gone. With an exhale, I texted Mom that I’d gotten a ride home with Brougham. Hopefully Ainsley would arrive before Mom finished up.

The day was normal out here. Cloudy skies, a little gray, a cool sixty-five degrees. A slight wind. Just as it’d been when Brougham and I had walked outside barely ten minutes ago. But nothing was the same. Nothing was ever going to be the same.

Maybe I should message Brougham.

But oh, oh no, what could I say? That I didn’t like him? Because maybe that wasn’t true. What if I said Ididlike him? What would that mean for us? I wasn’t ready for it to mean anything. Thirty minutes ago, I’d accepted the idea that he was Winona’s boyfriend. AndWinona! What would happen there? What if he was just intending on stringing us both along? If he liked me, why was he talking to Winona at all?

AndBrooke.

Not that Brooke should matter. Brooke was not going to happen. But was I ready to move on from her yet?

Yes.

No.

Mostly.

But it was one thing to be mostly there, and another thing to date someone else. To close the door on her completely.

Even if I did like Brougham.

Oh no. What if I did like Brougham?

Why hadn’t he given me a warning? Now my brain was all scrambled, and I didn’t know what I thought, or how I felt. I couldn’t talk to him like this. I might spontaneously combust.

But I couldn’t just leave him in silence. Because that would hurt him. And I didn’t know what I wanted, but Ididknow I didn’t want that. He didn’t deserve that.

So. So. Um.

I took some deep breaths, and glanced around to check he wasn’t sneaking up on me. Nope. All clear. Just swaying palm trees and the empty parking lot and a plastic bag tumbling in the distance along the asphalt.

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