Page 34 of Rampant

He leaned forward, closing some of the distance between us, and lowered his voice. “I’ve never been so scared as when I saw what you’d done. Lex…” He let out a breath. “I know you think of me as your brother and that’s why you fight this so much. But your body doesn’t lie. I know there’s room in your heart for me.” He lifted his head, gaze searching mine. “I hate that you love him, but I can accept it because I know you love me too. Please come back to me. I won’t force you. I won’t do anything you don’t want me to. I just need you in my life. Please, Lex.Please.”

I jerked my hand from his and edged away. “I almost killed myself over you.”

“Fuck, Lex…” He dropped his face into his hands.

Clutching my purse, I shot a glance through the window, where the sun beat down on my car, and wished I’d parked out front. I calculated how long it would take to cover the distance if I ran, but Zach looked up.

“I know I can’t take it back, but you need to come with me. Please.”

“I’m not going anywhere with you.”

“I don’t want you around him,” he said.

“Leave Rafe out of it!” I stood. “He wants nothing to do with me, so you have no reason to go off the deep end again over him.”

Zach also rose, his body rigid, mouth tight in a straight line. “I wasn’t talking about Rafe. I’m talking about Dad. Get the fuck out of that house, Lex. He’s the last person you should trust.”

“If you’re talking about his threat to have me committed, I already know about it.” He’d made that abundantly clear when I’d fought him about seeing the therapist.

Zach grabbed my bicep. “I’m talking about something much worse. You need to come with me.” He began yanking on my arm.

“Help!” I screamed, gaze zigzagging around the restaurant before landing on a beefy guy who looked like he could take my brother. He rose, expression startled, and Zach let go of my arm. I backed away as the guy neared. Zach came after me again until my rescuer detained him.

I whirled, the front door appearing so far away. Someone shouted, and I heard a ruckus indicating a fight had begun. People stood, mouths gaping as I flew past. I didn’t remember leaving the restaurant, didn’t remember rounding the building and getting into my car, or thrusting the key into the ignition. I stomped on the gas and shot into traffic.

I spent thirty mindless minutes driving east along the Columbia River. Every couple of miles, I gazed into my rearview, but as far as I could tell, Zach’s car wasn’t part of the mid-day traffic. I pulled off at a rest stop, hands shaking too much to drive further, and tried three times to punch in the correct code on my cell. Finally, I unlocked my phone and dialed Dad’s number.

As soon as he answered, all the adrenaline pumping through me crashed and burned, and I started crying, my whole body trembling.

“Dad! Zach was there.” A black Beemer pulled into the spot next to me, and I almost jumped out of my skin, fearing it was my brother. But a young redhead exited the vehicle, pushing huge sunglasses on top of her head as she walked to the restrooms, hips swaying. “Dad…I’m really scared right now.” I held my breath, waiting for him to say something.

Please, for once, let him give a shit about me.

“What happened?” he finally asked.

“After my appointment, I met up with Evelyn. We were having lunch when he called—”

“Alexandra,” he interrupted. “I’ll talk to your brother. It was just a phone call, but he knows better. I’ll make sure it doesn’t happen again.”

“No, he wasthere. He caused a scene after Evelyn left. He won’t stop. Please, Dad, I need to tell the truth about what happened. It’s eating me up—”

“Come home and we’ll talk about it.”

I shook my head, though I knew he couldn’t see me. My father’s gigantic estate was the last place I’d feel safe. I could only think of one place I equated with safety, which was really ironic, considering I’d have to cross a river to get to it. My subconscious knew exactly what it was doing—I’d already driven halfway to Dante’s Pass.

“Alexandra!” His voice rose, irritation more than apparent in the bite of his tone. Abbott De Luca wasn’t someone used to being ignored. “You need to come home now.”

“Okay,” I said, the word coming out a whisper. “I’ll be there soon.” I hung up before he figured out I was lying. I made one more phone call to arrange for a boat rental, then drove onto the highway again. By the time my father realized I wasn’t coming home, I’d already be on Rafe’s island. Of course, that depended on my ability to go near the river and set foot in a boat without having a full-blown panic attack.

My heart fluttered the whole way to Dante’s Pass and turned into an unbearable pounding as I braked in the parking lot next to the boat ramp. I shut off the ignition, and my anxiety thundered in my ears for several minutes. I kept my head straight, focusing on the restroom and the woman that came out holding a little girl’s hand. Sweat coated my palms, and my grip slipped from the steering wheel. To my left, I knew what waited for me.

How was I supposed to get into a boat when I couldn’t even bring myself to look at the river?

Sucking in a noisy breath, I swiveled my head before I chickened out. It was only water, and I wouldn’t even be alone, as the man I’d called on the way to take me to the island waited on the dock. Normally, his company only rented out boats, but I’d offered to pay extra if he’d take me.

If only I could get out of the stupid car and walk to the dock.

Quit being such a pussy.

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