Page 46 of Rampant

I knew I was dreaming again, but like every other time, it seemed vividly real. The gritty floor under my cheek. The rage firing through my veins at not being able to defend myself. Their hands banding around my wrists and ankles, keeping me immobile while their leader shoved his cock up my ass.

Nothing had ever hurt so much.

Nothing had ever made me feel so helpless, dirty, or ashamed.

As usual, I never saw their faces. I squeezed my eyes shut, and it took everything I had not to cry out, to contain the sting behind my lids so my shame didn’t liquefy. All I could do was ball my hands and wait until he finished. But that wasn’t the end. Not even close. They took turns, and at one point, they forced me to my knees and assaulted my mouth too. I bit the first one who shoved his filthy dick in and received a blow to the head for it.

The nightmare suddenly shifted and my hands fell free. Now I was the one on top, holding someone else down.

“Rafe, wake up.”

Dream…it was a dream, so why couldn’t I wake up?

“Rafe!”

Her voice finally penetrated, and I opened my eyes to find Alex’s shadowed face inches from mine. She was sprawled beneath me on the couch where I’d gone to sleep alone, though now our bodies were pressed together, chest to chest, thigh to thigh. I restrained her hands above her head with one hand and propped myself up with the other so I wouldn’t crush her.

“I’m awake,” I said, struggling to catch my breath. “Did I hurt you?”

“Um…no.”

Her uncertain tone made me grind my teeth. “Don’t lie to me. If I hurt you, tell me.”

“You didn’t hurt me.”

“Then what is it?” Sweat broke out on my temples and slid down my spine.

“You feel good, okay?” She inhaled then let the breath out in a whoosh. “You were having a bad dream, but when I tried waking you, you grabbed me and…I’m sorry.”

“Why are you apologizing?”

“For wanting to jump your bones when you’re still trembling from a nightmare. It’s not okay.I’mnot okay.”

I shifted my weight to the side, pressed her into the back of the couch, and wound an arm underneath her body. “You feel pretty fucking okay right now.” I grabbed her thigh and pulled her leg over mine, and my erection nestled between us. “Does that feel like I mind this?”

She groaned.

Or maybe I did. Suddenly, all the logic in the world didn’t matter. I wanted her, she wanted me. The rest of the world could go to hell. Tomorrow, I’d flagellate myself over poor choices and my stubborn memories. I filled my hand with her ass, pulled her even closer, and thrust my cock against the hot center obscured by her panties. Fucking hell. Two thin layers of material was all that separated us. And her damn tank top. Her ridiculously tiny tank top.

“Rafe.”

She breathed my name against my neck, and I shuddered. A good kind of shuddering, the kind that made me want to melt into her until we became one. I buried my nose in her hair and inhaled, feeling as if I would never get enough.

“This is insane,” I said.

“What is?”

“Wanting you so fucking much.” It was like she wore a pheromone with my name on it. “We can’t do this, Alex. There are a million and one reasons why this is a bad idea.”

Her breaths puffed against my skin in rapid succession. “Name one.”

“The shit you’ve been through.”

“You’re doing a good job of distracting me.” She nuzzled my jaw, and her fingers fisted in my hair.

“Fuck,” I said with another tantalizing shudder. “This isn’t the way to deal with it.” But my hand shared Alex’s agenda. It wedged between our bodies and freed my cock from my boxers. “Tell me to stop.”

“Never.” Her teeth lightly scraped along my scruffy face until she reached just underneath my ear, where her moan vibrated through me.

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