Page 36 of Slay the Gay Away, Daddy

Miles is staring at Austin, and Austin is looking at Miles like a deer in headlights. “Do you trust in the Lord, your God, young man?”

The man shrugs noncommittally. “I guess,” trying to end the interaction as soon as possible. Father Daddy has other plans, though.

“Good enough,” he says. “Give me your phone.”

Austin gapes at him. “I’d really rather not.”

Miles rolls his eyes. “Son, this is the house of God, and you are being called by Him. He will not be ignored.”

The man beside Austin—his stepdad, Dallas—knocks their shoulders together.

“I will not be ignored, Dan,” he says, making Austin snort a laugh at an inside joke. I’m not sure whyFatal Attractionstarring the illustrious Glenn Andrew Close is something a big macho man like Dallas would watch and lowkey fanboy, but there they are, cutting up in the middle of Sunday service. Another thing I’m unsure of is if Andrew really is Glenn Close’s middle name. Probably not, but it’s quirky and cute, so that’s what I’m going with.

“Boiled bunnies,” Austin says in a ridiculous voice, lifting one hand and forming a fist, his thumb poking out between two fingers, forming what I’m assuming is a nose. He uses his other hand to form two ears behind the bunny’s head. His stepfather follows suit, making his own idiotic bunny, but then the cutestthing happens. Dallas puts his bunny’s “nose” right against Austin’s and rubs it back and forth. Okay, that’s absolutely adorable. My life may not be one of the romance novels Miles writes, but if it were, I’m pretty sure this is where he would introduce the characters from the next book in his series. Since Dallas is Austin’s stepdad, I’m pretty sure that’s a bit too taboo for Miles to write, but I’m kind of fucking feasting on it. Kinda wanna see them go to town on each other while I cuddle up close in Daddy’s lap and watch. Obviously, I don’t want to do anything with anyone aside from Miles, but I wouldn’t mind watching. Miles probably—no, Milesdefinitelywould—take issue with it, so I guess that’s a dream that’s meant to die. Oh well, Daddy’s worth giving it up.

“I’m not sure what’s happening right now,” Miles announces to no one in particular. “But can it wait until service is over? The Lord is here, son. Don’t leave him hanging in the waiting room.”

Austin groans, then reaches into his pocket and pulls out his iPhone. Handing it over, adds, “I’m not telling you my password.”

There’s another growl, but this time it comes from Austin’s stepdad. “You put a password on it again?”

Austin’s eyes bulge, and he quickly tries to calm his stepdad. “It’s not what you think, sir.”

Dallas’ jaw grinds back and forth like he’s crushing glass to powder with his teeth. “Is that so?”

“Yes, sir,” he whispers, but it’s pretty clear he’s lying. Color me intrigued by this entire interaction.

“You’re on that dang site again, ain’t you, boy?” Dallas asks as Austin tugs his bottom lip between his teeth. “Have you been stroking it for strangers on the internet again, young man? We’ve talked about this. I will not tell you again, Austin. Keep your penis to yourself.”

“Amen,” Miles shouts, looking a little flushed in the cheeks. “That was my whole point. The Lord doesn’t want to see this young man—”

“Reverend?” Dallas says with a twinge of fire in his voice.

“It’s Pastor, actually—”

“I’ll call you what I want to call you.” He points an accusatory finger at Miles. “This ain’t about you or your sermon. This is about me and my boy, and the promise he’s broken by whipping it out for strangers again.”

Austin’s mom snorts a laugh. “No one would pay to see that.”

Austin glares at her. I know they’ve had a troubled past, what with his mother’s rampant methamphetamine addiction, but I see zero love in his eyes for her. He’s staring like her very existence is an affront to him.

“It’s paying my tuition. I made forty-thousand dollars last year. What did you make? Enough for a few shards of crystal methamphetamine?”

“Forty thousand?” she asks, her eyes widening, a glint of opportunism swirling in them as she ignores the accusation of feeding an unruly drug addiction. “We need to talk about increasing your rent.”

“We can do that.” Austin sounds unbothered at first, but then he adds, “Or I could just move out.” He pauses, smiling wider. “Again.” He casually looks at Dallas, then turns back to his mom with a smirk on his face. “I can be out of the house tonight.”

“No!” she shouts frantically. “There’s no need for all that.” Her eyes find Dallas’ and she shakes her head rapidly. “I won’t. I promise. I was only pulling his leg.” Honestly, the way Dallas glares at her, I don’t think he really cares one way or another. Austin does, though, because he places his hand on Dallas’ knee and smiles at her.

I know when Austin moved out to live with Tatum, Dallas left too. In cities as small as Tallulah, everyone knows everyone’sbusiness, so when Austin returned from school and moved back home, it was the talk of the town. Not many Tallulahns manage to escape. I did, but most don’t. Wrapped around those whispers were questions. Why did he come home? Why did his stepfather move back the day Austin returned, after years of estrangement from his wife.

Why, indeed?

Clearly done with this temporary distraction, Miles grabs the phone and carries it to the platform up front. Once he’s standing by the lectern, he fumbles with something in one of the wooden cubby holes on the other side. If he thinks he’s being sneaky, he’s very much mistaken. Austin’s phone thuds when Miles places it in the cubby, and when his hand comes into view, he’s holding up an old, first generation iPhone. Metal backing and all.

“Ah, Christ,” Mal and I say in unison. We turn to each other, small smiles on our faces.

“I hate you,” I whisper. “But that was kind of neat.”

---