Page 106 of The Road to Ruined

"No, kitten. I mean who." He twirls one of my curls around his finger. "You look so pretty, baby. I'm sorry about Sebastian. We should talk about him, though."

I hold my breath. "What…do you want to talk about?"

"What do you know about him, sweetie? Have you seen his face?"

"I loved him," I whisper. "You were right, but he doesn't love me. He called me a lying whore." I pause, choking on the words. "And then he left. And I know a lot about him; I know his dadgave him away when he was six to save himself. He had to pick a son, and the son he picked—"

"Was me," Declan finishes. "I know. I was only three, but I remember everything about that night, too. You said he was cruel, but you loved him."

I nod. "Yeah. I didn't know…not until after I saw you."

"What's he like? Is he…do you think—"

"No. I don't think he'd help us—if that's what you're going to ask—and he's not going to let us help him, especially now. He's really messed up…and he likes it. The way they trained him…he'll never be like us. He's curious about you, but that's where it ends." I explain to Declan everything I've heard from Sebastian about his life and the things he's done. "Now, he's so angry with me for not telling him where you were so he could kill you that he left; there's someone watching me, but it isn't him anymore. I thought maybe he could love me, and maybe we could…well, I guess that doesn't matter anymore."

"I see," he says.

"Does Luca know?"

"He didn't," he says. "After you told me the name, I told him. He's pretty pissed off that I'd kept it a secret. And about some of the things…you told him Sebastian did."

"Oh…yeah."

"We weren't allowed to talk about him; we cleaned everything of his out of the house that night and pretended he never existed. I think my dad assumed I'd be too young to remember him, but I remember everything."

He smiles sadly, running his fingertips up and down my bare arms. I wonder if maybe Declan isn't like me after all; maybe he wasn't born like this—maybe he was made, too.

"He'd been getting in trouble for skateboarding in the house, but he kept doing it anyway, and that day, he broke a family heirloom. He thought that's why they took him. He screamedabout how sorry he was all the way out the door. When Luca started getting in trouble, too, I was so afraid my dad was going to get rid of him that I started taking the blame for everything he did or hiding the evidence. I took him everywhere with me, did his homework for him. I already lost my mom and a brother, and my dad was never around. Maybe that's why I wanted to make my own family." He pauses, shaking his head. "I did a shitty job taking care of them, though, didn't I?"

And that's when I see it—Declan ishurt. He's not the same untouchable enigma he was a few months ago; he isn't evil, and he isn't a god. He's been gutted by all of this just like I have, and, maybe even more difficult for him, he's been humbled.

"Yes," I tell him. Because what else am I supposed to say? I tried the lie, and it wouldn't roll off my tongue. Brady and Rhett are dead, River and Hazel are gone for good, Luca got shot twice in one weekend, and he left us.

He laughs. "Well, you've never been afraid to tell me the truth, have you?"

"I've been told that I have a shitty sense of self-preservation. I'm pretty sure that's only gotten worse."

"That might still be true," Declan says. "But I'll never hurt you again, honey."

"I forgive you."

"Does that mean I won't have to drag you away from here kicking and screaming?" he asks.

I shake my head. "No. I'd go anywhere as long as I get to be with you and Luca."

He traces my jawline with his fingertips. "Even if it's forever, and you can never go back?"

"Yeah," I tell him. "I'm ready. I just want to go to the wedding first if I can."

"Let's go upstairs. We'll talk about the details, okay, baby?"

I nod. "Okay."

He brushes my hair away from my face and kisses my lips, then turns my head to the side. "You see that man over there by the door? Big guy with the sunglasses on?"

"Yeah."

"He works for me," he says. "He's going to be following us, okay? Nothing to worry about."

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