Page 82 of The Fate Of Us

They’ve booked me onto a project in London.

It’s a nine-month contract.

Addy, I’m so scared.

I don’t want to go.

Goldie’s terrified voice is the only thing I can focus on right now. It’s echoing in mymind, blinding me, making the world spin, and the walls of my dressing room feel that much smaller.

I should have been to see her sooner. I shouldn’t have limited our visits to holidays andher birthday to spend time with her. I was scared, to be honest, of seeing my parents. I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve seen them since I left California, partly because when I’d travel to L.A. to see Goldie, I’d make it my mission to never tangle our lives again.

Hearing Goldie tell me what they were doing to her, where they were taking her, I’dnever wanted to see them so badly. And not for the fuzzy reunion they were expecting, either.

It’ll be fine… I think.

College will be here when I get back.

It’s all fine.

My hands grip the sides of my head, silent tears streaming down my face at the ghost ofher voice haunting my thoughts.

She was too much like me at that age, that was the problem. I was terrified to say no, toturn down something my parents had likely fought for. I’d be a selfish little brat to deny the opportunities that were being handed to me.

Give it a chance, my darling. When I was your age, I would have done anything for anopportunity like this,my mom used to tell me in the car rides home after a day of auditions.

This is for the best, Adaline. Think of how our lives will change if you do this!My dadwould remind me as he escorted me on the first day of shooting.

And I sat there, in the passenger seat of the car, and nodded, too enthusiastically that Ihoped it would distract them from how badly my fingers were twitching, desperate to make it down the highway to get home and write.

And instead of being brave, I smiled, and said thank you, and did what I was told. Ipeople pleased my way through childhood, graciously smiled and agreed through my teens. Until one day, I realised how boring staying silent was.

And I left.

You left Goldie to take your place, my heart reminds me, to which I reply by grabbing thetissue box resting on the vanity and launching it to the back of the room—

“Ow, oh my God,” Someone calls from the door, as I frantically wipe away any evidencethat I was sad and twist my back to face whoever it was. “Is this what I get for not knocking?”

The voice laughs, the whimsy tones make me realise it was Amber.

Thanks, Universe, thanks a lot.

“Oh. I’m sorry.” I grit out as I turn back to face the vanity, slyly watching her emerge intothe room in the reflection, like a deer braving its first winter.

“Thought I’d come and check on you, I feel like we’ve barely had a conversation thatwasn’t written by someone else,”

Could that possibly be because you and the boy I thought I was going to marry are nowdating?I want to say to her, but the reminder that she and Nate were seeing each other… maybe… and only a few hours ago I had my mouth on his and—

I kissed Nate.

He kissed me.

His mouth collapsed onto mine, and I didn’t pull away.

That wasn’t what we did. We were never meant to do that. And I’m thinking all of thiswith Amber in the room. Amber, the girl he’s dating. Maybe dating. I forgot to ask him. But still, I shouldn’t have kissed him back. I should’ve pulled away the second my thoughts caught up with what was happening.

I didn’t want to pull away though. I wanted to kiss him. It took all of three seconds andthe swipe of his tongue over mine for me to realise that I’d wanted to kiss him for a while.

The ghost of his mouth pressed against me, the muscles stretched across his backmoulding in my palms, forcing me to drop my head and clamp my eyes as hard as I could. Heat pooled in my stomach, descending lower, the thought of him spurring on something I didn’t know how to—

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