Page 86 of Redemption

I gasped at her words, unable to believe what she said. She barged past me and up the stairs, stomping with fury. Daisy had always had a sharp tongue but today her words were cruel, which wasn’t like her.

I went inside after her but instead of speaking, I just went straight to my room. It was too late to try and go back to bed, I was all riled up and needed to expend my energy. I headed out to the stables and saddled Chester.

We sailed across the pasture, into the forest and I pushed him hard. I could tell he enjoyed it, he seemed to relish the challenge of leaping over fallen trees and turning around sharp bends. His nostrils flared as he breathed hard and even let out an excited whinny.

I rode away from my problems, away from the ranch that I didn’t know how to help and couldn’t even fathom why I wasn’t thinking about it. I rode away from the question of me and Jack, unsure how to answer it. I didn’t want to end what we were doing but Daisy’s words were bugging me.

I rode until my thoughts were obliterated and all I could see was nature as it passed by me and Chester in a blur. Eventually Chester began to slow, worn out, so I pulled him over near the lake and tethered him by the water. He had a drink and a poke around in the dirt with his hoof while I watched the still water.

I contemplated life and the situation with the ranch and why I had such a damn block against what to do to fix it.

“Daddy wouldn’t have ignored it. He would have fixed it,” I said to Chester who snuffled close to me. He lookedat me and I’m sure he raised one eyebrow.

“Okay, okay, maybe you’re right, he did get us into this mess in the first place. And now I’ve got to pick up the pieces, but I don’t have enough cattle left to sell and…I don’t want to.”

Chester flicked his tail and I buried my head in my hands. “Am I really talking to the horse?” I groaned. I heard rustling from behind me.

“Well, sometimes it’s good to talk to someone who won’t talk back.”

I spun around and there was Jack, sauntering towards me, leading Pickles by her reins. My heart did that silly pitter-patter thing and I breathed a sigh of relief at seeing him.

“How did you know I was here?”

He tethered Pickles next to Chester and came and sat behind me. He put his legs on either side of mine and I sank back into the cradle of his body. “Saw you take off,” he murmured, his lips against my temple.

“Shit, you wanted to show me something, didn’t you?”

He chuckled. “I did. But this is good too. I just wanted time with you, away from everyone else.”

We sat in silence. He stroked my arms and continued resting his stubbled jaw against my temple. We watched the water, the still silent lake with birds tweeting all around, and a serenity enveloped me.

“Wanna tell me what you’re riding away from?” he whispered, like he didn’t want to break the peace and quiet, and I appreciated it.

I paused. I didn’t want him to think I couldn’t handle it on my own. I hated admitting I needed help and wasn’t strong enough to look after the ranch despite all the years of practice I had doing it.

He squeezed my arms, kneading mybiceps. “Hey, you can trust me. I care about you and want to help, any way I can.”

I turned my face and buried it in his neck. “I hate admitting this, but I don’t have the slightest clue what to do.”

“About?”

“The ranch. There’s so much debt and yeah, I paid off some but I don’t know what to do with the rest. It’s an eye-watering amount of money. My brain won’t give me any ideas and I feel useless because I’ve spent years looking after this place with Daddy, and now I don’t have the slightest idea what the hell to do and there’s no one to guide me and I don’t have the confidence to do it alone and I’m a complete failure.” I sighed deeply once the words were out, like my body purged them.

He placed a soft kiss to my temple that felt too damn good, too damnright.“Thank you for sharing that with me. Firstly, you’re amazing.”

I snorted and tried to push him away but he shackled me to him. “You are,” he reiterated. “You might have experience with the ranch, which I see every day by the way, but that doesn’t mean you should know how to doeverything. Doesn’t mean you should know how to run the business side of things.”

“I know but—”

“I wasn’t finished, sweetheart,” he admonished and damn if my lady parts didn’t enjoy the stern tone of his voice.

“Sorry. Please continue,” I said, smirking and squirming back into his neck.

“You’re the best rancher I’ve seen. The way you know what’s happening all the time, you know the schedules and you spot problems and solve them before they become a real issue. You can spot when an asshole bisonis causing mischief. You’ve got a great relationship with the animals, the girls, Tate and well, me. I really look up to you when we’re out there in the pastures. You’re amazing, but you can’t do it all.”

I bristled at his words and as if he knew I would, he stroked my arms again and softened his voice. “Why don’t you tell your sisters, let them in and let them help you? Let me help you?”

I shook my head. “They’ve been through so much recently and I don’t want to worry them with this. I didn’t get a choice about coming back here and looking after them and the ranch and Daddy, but they have choices. They have lives to live and I won’t tether them here out of obligation or guilt.”

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