Page 102 of Redemption

Thinking about Gertie’s words and Teddy’s influence, maybe I should look into therapy. I scoffed at the thought but my brain refused to let it go. I clearly wasn’t getting very far dealing with it on my own. But is that because I didn’t want to? I got to live my life, I got to have fun and go out and work hard and love, and Sherry didn’t get to do any of that. Because of me. Making myself feel shit was a way to punish myselffor what happened, and I felt like I should be punished, it was only fair.

But what if you’ve been punished enough?A tiny voice piped up, a voice that sounded a little bit like Kat. Maybe I’d been so busy focusing on the need to punish myself even after my sentence ended that I hadn’t taken a step back to see if Ishouldbe doing that.

I glanced down at Teddy, then at the ruined diorama of the new guest ranch. Hope sprung to life at the possibility of this project. “Maybe it’s time I start living for me?” I said to Teddy. He barked in agreement.

I pulled my phone out of my pocket and opened up Google and proceeded to search fortherapists near you. Once that was done and I had a couple of places to call, I stood up and picked up the diorama and began to rebuild.

CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

Katarina

It had been two weeks since I’d run from the cabin, blinded by tears.

There was still an awkward tension between me and Jack, but we managed to work together which was the important thing. I didn’t know what I would have done if he had quit the ranch. I knew he felt bound here but there really wasn’t anything stopping him from leaving except his honor.

Some days it hurt to be so near him. I felt like if he looked at me, I’d shatter, but I held myself together. Gertie held me together. I didn’t know what I’d do without her right now.

She’d given me a stern talking to. Thatwoman had a way with words. She’d told me to stop being so stubborn about letting my sisters help out with the ranch. She’d reminded me that it was their home too and they had a right to have a say in what happened here. She was right, Gertie was always right. I’d been blinded by my need to prove myself and lead them now that our father was gone.

But a good leader listens to others. And that was what I was doing today. The girls wanted to have a family meeting so there we were all sitting around the table, Leo hovering over by the sideboard with Gertie.

“Okay, let’s hear it, get all the ideas out,” I said, looking around at their excited faces.

August put her hand up. “Can I go first?”

“Of course.”

“Um, I would love to do horse riding lessons here. Maybe do some school visits for the children with learning difficulties. We actually have some very calm horses who wouldn’t be startled by some of the loud noises or sudden movements that the kids might make and it would be a great way for them to interact with animals.”

I was touched that she had come up with something so thoughtful. There was a local school for children who had learning and behavioral challenges, and there wasn’t a lot around Reverence for them to experience.

“I think that’s a great idea, August. Let’s take a look at what we need to do that: insurance, health and safety, and so on.”

August beamed at me and nodded, beginning to scribble furiously in the notebook she’d brought. I looked around the table and everyone was smiling except Daisy who was peering towards the door and glancing at her watch.

“Who’s next?”

“I wanna do a fundraiser for the fire station,” Maddy said, and Leo pushed off from the sideboard and stood behind Maddy, placing his hands on her shoulders in support.

“Tell me about it, what do you picture?” I said.

“We could have a demonstration from the team, have competitions like who can put the uniform and equipment on the quickest, that kind of stuff.”

“You could make it a fundraising fair and get local business owners in to show off their products, have food vendors and play games.” I tapped my chin thoughtfully. “The vendors would donate a percentage of their profits in exchange for the visibility.”

“You could auction off some of the guys, ooh and do a Hotties with a Hose calendar!” Tilly piped up and I wasn’t sure how I felt about my almost sixteen-year-old sister thinking like that, but I didn’t want to stifle anyone’s creativity.

“We could make the calendar exclusive to the fair, like a ‘when it’s gone, it’s gone’ type of thing. That way it would bring in more fairgoers and make people spend more money to support the station, the ranch and local vendors?” I added. My head began spinning with ideas. “We can host weddings, team-building days, survival trips!” I shouted each one out, unable to stop the flow.

“Yes!” Gertie shouted, clapping her hands together and whooping. “There she is, now you’re thinking like the badass businesswoman I know you are!”

I laughed, shaking my head but my cheeks flushed with pleasure knowing she had my back. The excitement in the room escalated and the ideas were thrown around faster than August could write.

I glanced around at the enthusiastic chatter,amazed at how we’d worked together to come up with some exciting events and ways to support not just the ranch but local causes too. I was annoyed at myself again for shutting the girls out when they had so much to offer.

When everyone finally died down, I turned to Daisy. “Did you have something you wanted to share?” There was still tension between us. It was strange because I felt like she was avoiding me and keeping something from me, I just didn’t know what. I had a feeling it had to do with the debt on the ranch and how it mysteriously got paid but when I’d pressed her on it, she had remained tight-lipped and snippy.

“Yes, but I just need—” She was interrupted by a knock on the front door. “Ah, there’s my assistant now.” She got up and left the room.

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