Page 52 of Can't Always Get What You Want

And hasn’t put the moves on me.

My phone buzzes as I sit in the car, reflecting on our conversation.

Poppy: TITS UP, SOLDIER.

Jeez. Why is she like this?

Me: I’m literally still sitting in the car. I have to go home and get ready still…

Poppy: This feels like it’s taking an eternity.

Me: Well I can’t text and drive, can I???? Not to mention, I don’t know what to wear. It’s a date but it’s like…what does one wear to the grocery store???

Poppy: Beats the hell out of me. I’d definitely look sexy, though—everything but heels.

Me: You think?

Poppy: For sure. Show some skin too and make the dads jealous. Who knows, if this doesn’t work out with Luca maybe some other single will swoop in and save you in the meat department.

Me: Okay but…what KIND of sexy? Like, Oops, did I forget to wear a bra?!

Poppy: Exactly. Go for: I care enough to show you skin but not enough to get lipstick on a rotisserie chicken.

Me: That was disturbingly specific.

Poppy: You’re welcome.

Me: Alright. I’m going home. Shower. Soft curls. Green jacket you gave me for my birthday with the black tank top?

Poppy: YESSSSS. Sexual but responsible. You shop organic but your pussy will RUIN him.

My phone buzzes again, but it’s a different name this time.

Luca: Hey—still good for later?

Poppy: That tank top makes your tits look amazing.

Without thinking, I quickly typemy reply:

Me: Honestly when he sees me in this tank top with my titties out he’s gonna propose next to the canned beans. LOL

I hit send.

And immediately realize…

I sent it to Luca.

My soul leaves my body.

“No. No no no no no no no?—"

I fumble with my phone like I can physically pull the text back out of cyberspace, my heart sprinting laps around my chest.

New message appears.

Luca: Well, when you get to the store, you’ll find me standing near the beans.

I want to slam my face into the steering wheel.

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