Page 30 of Can't Always Get What You Want

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Nova: If we’re sharing custody, I deserve equal rights.

Luca: Fine. But that means scheduled visitation.

Nova: How exactly would that work?

Luca: Weekly meetings. Probably over dinner.

Nova: Now this includes dinner? FREE dinner?

Luca: Listen—if we’re co-parenting this cup, we need to discuss logistics.

Nova: Hmmm.

Luca: Don’t act like you’re not considering it.

Nova: I could be persuaded.

Luca: Our child deserves stability, Nova.

Nova: Except when you left it behind at the restaurant.

Luca: That was a MISTAKE!

Nova: A huge mistake. A RECKLESS mistake. Maybe I should get full custody.

Luca: Whoa. Now you’re just being cruel.

Nova: Actions have consequences, Luca.

Luca: This is why we need weekly check-ins. To establish trust.

Nova: LOL you’re cracking me up…

Luca: So, when is our first custody exchange?

Nova: Well, I do like free dinner.

Luca: And I do like spending time with you.

Nova: Cute.

Luca: I try. What’s your availability?

Nova: I coulddo Friday.

Luca: Friday it is. Our child deserves only the finest care.

Nova: Done.

Luca: Amazing. I’ll bring the custody paperwork.

Nova: Please make it official-looking. I want bullet points and a contract.

Luca: Say less. I’ll draft up an ironclad agreement.

Nova: Can’t wait.

Luca: Oh, so you’re excitedddd.

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