Page 47 of The Beta's Heart

He and I spent hours together, sometimes talking, sometimes sitting in silence. Helping him heal became my mission, and a way to keep the loneliness from creeping in.

After a particularly grueling day of Rube remembering more than he wanted to, I found myself walking through the woods surrounding Tall Pines. The night was cool, the air filled with the scent of pine and earth, and I stopped at a small clearing to watch the moon cast her silver glow over everything.

Standing there, I allowed myself to think of what my mate might be like, should the Moon Goddess bless me with one. Would she like superhero movies like I did? Would she be a perfect contradiction, getting as excited over Miss Dior as she did prisms? Would she pick up every sparkly rock she saw when we went hiking?

Like River,I chuckled to myself, then sobered up when I realized what I was doing.Stop thinking about her. You’re going to get your heart broken.

“You okay?” Rube’s voice broke through my thoughts, and I turned to see he’d followed me.

“Yeah, just thinking things I shouldn’t be,” I replied, forcing a smile. “Areyouokay? You shouldn’t have walked this far.”

“I’m fine. Got to get my strength back somehow.”

“Can I ask you something? You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to.”

“Go for it.”

“Alpha Ash said Leo Halder was possessed by a lesser demon.That’swhat caused the most damage, isn’t it?”

“Yeah.” Rube sank down on a nearby stump and stared up at the moon. “My wolf absorbed what he could, so Larch is in worse shape than I am, but the witches warned me I’ll have flashbacks and nightmares. That one who’s mates with Beta Crew? Sara? She all butorderedme to see one of the pack deltas the second we got home.”

“Sounds wise to me.” I shrugged.

“They also said if I could find my mate, that would help me heal sooner. What do they expect me to do? Snap my fingers and makehim or her or them appear?” he groused. “It’s not like I haven’t been trying to find my mate!”

“I’m sure it will happen soon. Look how many matches have happened in the last few days! The Goddess won’t leave you out.”

“The thought is the only thing keeping me going right now.” He swiveled his flat, black eyes to meet mine. “Without that hope, I think… I think I might try something stupid.”

“Hey, you’re too smart and too strong to give up,” I told him fiercely. “You hear me, gamma? I know it feels like you’re stuck in a pit of black tar, and your head keeps slipping under, and maybe sometimes it feels like it wouldn’t be such a bad thing to let go.”

“That’s exactly what it feels like.” His eyebrows shot up as if he were shocked that anyone else could feel the way he did.

“But you can’t,” I said. “Youhaveto keep fighting. There’s a way out of that pit, and youwillfind it. Whether it’s on your own or with someone’s help, even if it takes months or years, you’ll find it. And when you do, you’ll look back and see how far you’ve come and be amazed at yourself. You hear me, Rube?”

“I hear you, bro.” He nodded slowly, his eyes glistening with a mixture of pain and determination.

“You are not alone.” I clapped my hand on his shoulder. “You never have been and you never will be.”

“Thanks, man. I know that, but I… I needed tohearit.”

I didn’t have a solution for him; that was something he had to find within himself. I could help keep his hope alive, though.

And sometimes, that was all a person needed to keep fighting.

12. Helping Hand

Tyler

Fighter practice was always fun. It was one of those few times I could blow off steam and no one got hurt.

Much.

Today, Landry and I managed to get Reuben out on the field, where we stretched and warmed up, the sun beating down on us and filling the air with the scent of sweat and fresh-cut grass.

“Ready to get your ass handed to you, bro?” Landry teased, bouncing on his toes.

“In your dreams, man,” I shot back, giving him a playful shove.

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