Page 45 of The Beta's Heart

“Even if it feels like it, I know you aren’t replacing Ev,” he said finally, his voice low and strained. “It’s just… I wasn’t ready to say goodbye to him yet. Hell, I was never going to be ready to say goodbye to him.”

“You think Iwantedthis? To step up to a beta position before I even graduated high school or turned eighteen?” I locked eyes with him. “I didn’t ask foranyof this.”

“Ev was my best friend. We grew up together. He was like a brother to me. Now here you are, standing whereheshould be. Every time I see you, it’s like a slap in the face.”

“I’m sorry for your loss, Matthew, I really am, but I’m not him, and I’m never going to be him.” Frustration made me drop my water bottle and surge to my feet.

“I know.” Matthew took a deep breath, his shoulders relaxing a fraction. “I know you’re not Ev, and I know it’s not your fault he’s dead, but it’s so fucking hard to look at you and not seehim.”

“I get it, man, but I’m here now and I’m not going anywhere. I’m doing the best I can, so either deal with your issues or stay out of my way.”

For a moment, there was only the sound of our heavy breathing and the distant rustle of the trees, then Matthew looked at me, really looked at me, for the first time.

“I’m sorry for treating you like shit when you never deserved it,” he said, his voice still rough, but his tone a little softer. “I’ll do better at seeing Tyler James, and not because both alpha and luna told me to, either. Don’t expect me to make it easy on you, though.”

“Wouldn’t have it any other way,” I smirked, my eyes lighting with dark humor.

We stood there in silence for a moment, no hugs or tears, only a newborn understanding that we were each fighting our own battles.

“Bad news is, break’s over!” Crew called out. “Good news is, this is the last round!”

With that, we went back to the grind, dodging each other’s punches and kicks, with a new, uneasy truce between us.

Later, as I crashed in one of the guest rooms, I prayed I wouldn’t embarrass myself with a nightmare.

Me watch,River offered.Me guard Ty-Ty sleep.

Thanks, buddy,I mumbled as I drifted off.

If it were possible for him to fight off bad dreams, I knew he would, and maybe that helped me sleep through the day without disturbing anyone. Either way, I woke up more refreshed than usual and hopped in the shower humming a little song.

Hopefully, such a good rest would help me with what we betas had planned for this evening: Officially introducing luna to our wolves. Sure, Lark had gone on a run with them, but luna hadn’t had a chance to meet them in their fur yet, and we wanted to fix that.

I volunteered to go last, thinking that if River got out of hand, I’d have the others’ wolves right there to help. I didn’t think he’d do anything to scare her, but she was still very fragile. Her eyes always showed a hint of fear and uncertainty, and the nightmare she had one night was further proof.

When she started screaming bloody murder in the middle of the night, Em and I did our best to comfort her in the absence of her mates, talking to her softly as she hugged her bunny doll and drinking hot chocolate with her, and eventually she calmed down enough to go back to sleep. She was comfortable with both Em and me and trusted us, which made me doubly glad we’d pulled the night shift and could be there for her when she needed it the most.

The nightmare reminded us all that she was still healing, however, and I didn’t want River to cause any incidents that might affect my relationship with her. I had a good talk with him and, yes, promised him ice cream—birfday cake dis time, Ty-Ty—if he was a good boy and didn’t frighten her.

Maybe I should take the alphas up on their offer of a ‘River management allowance,’I thought ruefully.I’m at the ice cream parlor nearly every day.

Good thing I worked out so hard and burned off all the calories, or River would have given me love handles by now!

After luna agreed to meet our wolves, Em shifted first and introduced her to Cove, then Matthew with Arroyo, then Tris with Creek, and finally Crew with Bay.

She held out a fist for each wolf to sniff, but she didn’t try to pet any of them, possibly too scared or intimidated. Beta wolves were big, bigger than any other wolves in the pack except for her alpha mates’ wolves, and luna was a runt, smaller than even an omega wolf.She might have seen them for a moment before Lark’s run, but she hadn’t had a chance to interact with them.

Not sure this is going well,Matthew linked all of us when luna only stood there staring at the four pony-sized wolves and bit her bottom lip, shifting from one foot to the other.

Yeah, but might as well finish it now,Tris linked back.

Go ahead, Ty,Em added.

With a nod, I ducked behind a tree and stripped down.

“Ready, Riv?” I whispered as my wolf’s excitement bubbled up. “Remember, be gentle.”

Birfday cake ice cream, River replied solemnly, and I couldn’t help but smile.

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