Page 119 of To Hell With It

What did it say?

Mostly dirty talk, like what they were going to do next time they saw each other, what he likes, what she likes. He never talked to me like that even when I tried to have dirty talk with him.

I didn’t need to know about Una’s dirty talk withShaun did everythingbut I didn’t have the heart to ask her to stop.

Apparently he likes it when she sticks her finger up his arse – can you believe that? Up his arse! He never asked me to do that.

Would you have wanted him to?

No.

And she likes it when he pinches her nipples.

Ow.

Oh, and she dresses up for him, she has a maid’s outfit, how original.

Una, I know it must be hard, but maybe it’s best you don’t read anymore.

I read it all. It’s been going on the whole time from what I can work out. I hate him.

Good.

What am I going to do, Pearl?

You’re going to take small steps, big strides.

ChapterFifty-Nine

When I landed, Una flung her arms around me like a long-lost lover and I let her because I hadn’t had a hug like that the whole time I’d been in New Zealand.

In that moment, I didn’t think about how her wet cheeks smudged against mine, or how her nose had probably dripped onto my hair (because that’s what happened when Una cried, her nose ran) or how I needed a shower as soon as I got home. I thought about how good it felt to be embraced by my best friend.

But when we were back in her car, I pulled out my sanitiser and rubbed it into my hands.

‘Still on the hard stuff then?’

‘I’m working on it.’

‘Good to hear it. They should have OCDA meetings.’

‘What?’

‘Obsessive Compulsive Disorder Anonymous,’ she said. ‘Can you imagine what that would be like, a load of people with OCD in the same room? By the time you’d all sat down it would be time to stand up again.’

We both giggled.

‘So, are you glad you went? Even though it all went wrong with Turbo? I’m going to call him Turbo Head from now on, by the way.’

‘He is a Turbo Head, and yes, I’m glad I went and I’m actually glad it went wrong. I’d never have gone to the other places or met the people I met if it hadn’t – I’d probably have stayed in Te Puke.’

Una made a puke sign with her fingers in her mouth.

‘Has he tried to contact you?’

‘I don’t know, I blocked him.’

‘Good.’

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