Page 124 of I'm Not Your Pet

Because of course I did.

It wasn’t till much later that I realized by trying to save all the humans I’d made Roark’s worst nightmare come true.

Unease colored my spots gray the moment we left planet Sha’hPihn. Mala and Ushuu were the only other people that understood my true trepidation.

It wasn’t the huu-mans themselves that worried me, or even that we now had sixteen extra mouths to feed—though that in itself was a challenge. I was concerned because themomentwe had publicly boarded the ship with such precious cargo, I knew it was only a matter of time before someone tried to take the huu-mans back.

As a whole, the flock of huu-mans were quiet, sweet, mildly terrified—and not threatening in the slightest. Huu-mans were smaller than most species, their limbs weak and unchangeable. And all of them were so different-looking, it was fascinating. They had more varieties than Sahrks did when it came to coloring, and I knew I was not the only man on board who found that beautiful.

My crew was as enamored with them as I was.

And despite all that they had been through before joining us, there was no dissent amongst the tiny creatures, for which I was glad. I did not fear the huu-mans, but I did worry abouttheir safety and their happiness. I worried for Huu-goh’s heart, because he had given it to them the moment he’d seen them at the auction.

Their peace was a relief.

Though my unease never fully faded.

Huu-goh and the prickly huu-man—Briar—had their work cut out for them. Watching my little mate come into himself as a leader was riveting. He spent as much time away from our room as I did now, tending to his people in the section of the ship we’d cleared for them. Less and less time was spent in the labs with Ushuu at first, but the elder Sahrk didn’t mind. He’d often be found down with Huu-goh and the huu-mans himself, enjoying their stories, and sharing some of his own.

His presence made a large difference, helping the huu-mans feel more at ease around us.

I always kept extra bunks in the cargo hold for emergencies and it had only taken a few hours on that first day to get an extra storage room set up for their flock. I wished I could offer more to them, but it wasn’t safe to linger. The target painted on our back made it imperative we seek the stars immediately.

My nightmares returned.

Every night, the same memory repeated.

Huu-goh tried to comfort me—and I tried to hide, but he saw right through me.

I was certain I wouldn’t be able to breathe again till we arrived safely home on Osheania. It was a month-long journey from Sha’hPihn. It would be the longest month of my life. Between my very real fears, and Huu-goh and my mating ceremony, there was a never-ending list of things to worry about.

“Roark,” Ushuu was gentle as he latched onto my elbow, pulling me aside. Huu-goh had been tinkering around inside the lab all day today—for the first time since we’d set off three weeksago—and I’d finished my duties at the helm of the ship in time to catch him in action.

“You are going to worry yourself sick,” Ushuu frowned at me, his spots gray with concern.

“I cannot help it.”

Huu-goh sat obliviously on a stool across the room, fiddling with a machine on the counter. I had no idea what it was, and wasn’t certain I wanted to. My head was too full. Maybe when I felt more like myself, I’d ask.

Part of me wanted to pull him into our rooms and hide with him until all of this passed. But that was the coward’s route. And not one I would ever take. I was ashamed of myself for even thinking it.

Briar eyed me suspiciously from his seat beside my mate. He had stuck close to Huu-goh since the moment the huu-mans had come aboard. Almost like he was guarding him, as I did. I did not like the way Briar looked at me. As if he thought I was not what I said I was, and he was waiting for me to show my true colors.

It was a shame that one so small could be so injured.

His heart was battered and bruised, and I hoped time with my Huu-goh would help him realize that not all beasts were monsters.

“You can’t control the future,” Ushuu said as he gave my arm a gentle rub, his tendrils finding mine and winding us together in a soothing squeeze. “You are exhausting yourself to the point of weakness. Should something happen, do you not think your strength would be your greatest asset?”

He had a point.

I grunted, then sighed, dropping my head in shame. “I don’t know if I can survive it a second time.” I wished I was being dramatic, but it was the truth. My darkest truth. Gnarled, broken, brittle. “The first time I did not have much, and still,having that taken nearly broke me. Now I haveeverything. I cannot afford to lose my heart so soon after I found it.”

Ushuu would understand better than anyone.

He’d lived through my worst nightmare.

Huu-goh must have sensed my distress because he turned, his bright eyes dimming as a worried twist curled his lips. He was off his seat and across the room in seconds, looking between the two of us with concern. “What’s wrong?” he asked in his own language.

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