Page 55 of Eight Seconds to Fly

He laughed, a little puff of air cooling the sweat on my collarbone. “You had no idea just how perfect you were. You still are.”

“I love you too, Branch. You were my first crush and I never shook you. Even when I hated you, I loved you.”

He huffed. “I might have been a bit of an asshole when I was a teenager.”

I pulled back his head so I could give him an incredulous look. “You think?”

He leaned forward on his arms and kissed me. “I’ll make up for it, I promise. Beau always said that you were more likely to castrate me than love me back then.”

I stiffened at the mention of Beau. But this wasn’t the time to talk about it. This moment was just for me and Branch, the rest could come later. So I just held Branch close and prayed that it would all work itself out. “He wasn’t wrong. You were a jerk in Junior year and then a man whore in Senior.”

He winced but shrugged.

“I was young and stupid.”

“It was like five years ago, Old Man. You are still young and stupid.”

He squeezed me tight and shifted a little, reaching down to scoop his undershirt off the ground. He pulled out and cleaned up our combined fluids. “Come on. We’ll go have a cold shower and clean up. Then we better head back to Colorado Springs.”

I nodded and did the post hardcore sex waddle to the bathroom while Branch had first shower.

Twenty minutes later, blood significantly cooled and looking somewhat presentable, we rode back across the fields toward the other farmhouse, me on the back of the ATV, my arms wrapped around the guy of my literal teenage wet dreams and wondering how the fuck my life got so wonderfully complicated.

23

If I thought Jack and Judy’s speculative looks were bad, they were nowhere near as bad as the guys when Branch and I arrived back at the hotel that night. They were all in Branch and Beau’s room, watching NASCAR and drinking beers. It was a scorchingly hot day, and the small air conditioning unit barely made a dent in the moist heat that beat against the doors. I stood in front of it, lifted my shirt and let the frigid air cool my underboob sweat.

“You look hot,Querida.Perhaps you should just take your shirt off altogether?” Frankie was sitting there in shorts, nothing else. They were all shirtless, and I wanted to take a picture and save it in my spank bank for a rainy day. They were all so beautiful in their own way. Dylan’s lithe sexiness, and Frankie’s bigger, bulkier goldeness. Beau wasn’t as ripped as the rest, but he was solid and strong, his body not cut but there was still not an ounce of fat on him. Branch unbuttoned his shirt, letting it slip off his shoulders.

“Get mauled by a bobcat, Branch?” Beau teased.

Dylan laughed at my blushing cheeks. “Or maybe just a kitten?”

I flipped them all the bird and Beau grabbed me as I walked past, pulling me into his lap and kissing my neck. “We’re just teasing. I’m glad you and Branch have gotten over your weirdness.”

I sunk into the solidness of him. “Well I’m about to make the weirdness worse, because we need to talk.” He stiffened beneath me. “We all need to talk.”

Branch just walked over and scooped a beer out of the mini fridge. He got one for me and I took it gratefully. They were all looking at me now, NASCAR forgotten. I climbed off Beau’s lap and sat on the end of the bed. I needed to be able to see them all for this conversation.

“We have a problem.”

“You’re pregnant?” Frankie gasped and I frowned.

“What? Fuck no. I’m on the pill and you guys are all very safe.” I didn’t mention my little bareback ride with Branch but that was neither here nor there. Or the first time with Beau. Jesus, maybe I needed my head read. “We all agreed that this… situation would go on for as long as it took me to choose one of you.”

Everyone tensed then, and it broke my heart. They were invested. None of them were in this just for fun. I swallowed hard and straightened my shoulders. “The problem is, I can’t do it. I can’t choose between you. It's impossible and I just can’t. I would rather choose none of you than only one because whoever I chose would only be getting a quarter of my heart, and the rest would be roaming around the countryside with the other three of you.”

“I will still love you, still be your friend, even if you chose one of the others,” Frankie said softly, and it tore at my heart. He would. I know he would. And how cruel would that make me?

I shook my head. “You don’t understand. I wouldn’t be happy either.”

Branch was frowning, and I could see his brain turnover what happened today. I told him I loved him. I could see him trying to work out if that meant I would choose him if push came to shove, and whether he’d be happy with what remained. “What do you suggest?”

I cleared my throat and met Dylan’s eyes. He gave me an encouraging nod. He knew what was coming, supported it. If I could have soaked in his strength in that moment, I would have. “Are you happy right now? Traveling together, staying together. Living together? We are all friends, well I know Frankie was a bit of an outsider but he fits, and Dylan doesn’t have the history the rest of us have, but I know those things will come with time.”

Frankie was eyeing me now, trying to work out where I was going with this. “Yes…” he said hesitantly.

I looked at Beau who said, “If you’re asking if seeing you every day is better than four years of pining after you, then the answer is yes.”

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