Page 29 of The Redeemable 4

“Clear!”

The thumping pulse of electricity hitting her chest rocked me. But it was followed by the modulated beeping of her heartbeat on the monitor.

I released the breath I was holding. And Oz. I hadn't realized I was clutching his forearm like a lifeline. It was a wonder I didn’t snap his arm.

The doctor spoke in a low voice to the nurses, before turning toward our fragile little group. He placed a hand on Eli’s shoulder. “It’s too late, my friend. There is no time left to wait for a viable organ.”

Lux growled a low, ominous sound. “She can have mine.”

Eli shook his head. “It doesn’t work like that. Besides I had us all tested. None of us would be a match.”

The doctor had on his warm compassionate mask. “It’s time to say goodbye.”

With that, he left us alone with Arcadia. Clary went back over, and straightened her skewed gown, placed a pillow back under her head.

Eli walked over and laid his head on her chest. And cried. He cried until his body shook with the force of his sobs.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he just repeated it over and over. “I wasn’t enough. I couldn’t save you, no matter what I did, and I’m sorry. I couldn’t believe that there wasn’t something I couldn’t do, that your death was preordained. My fucking pride wouldn’t let me believe that and now I failed you and I’m so fucking sorry.” The force of his pain tore at my skin, at my soul.

Lux sat in the chair and covered his face with his hands, letting out a feral sound of pain that was only partly muffled by his palm.

Clary was surprisingly calm. She moved to Oz and took the big man in her arms, stroking his back as he cried silent tears of pain.

I was numb. Battered by their pain, I knew this wouldn’t be the end for Arcadia and I. We would see each other again. But I still mourned the life she could have had.

“Please, please,” Eli was beginning to sound more desperate, and I was glad that I didn’t have Arcadia’s soul with me right now. She’d be ruined seeing these three in that sort of pain and unable to soothe them.

The door opened and closed, and I ignored the sounds of nurses fussing around. I couldn’t drag my eyes away from tragedy playing out before me.

Another nurse slammed into the room, the sound of the door hitting the wall making me jump and whirl around to look at her, my irrational anger flaring to life. We wanted to mourn in peace, how hard was it to give us just one moment?

The newcomers cheeks were flushed red and she was out of breath. “A heart has just become available, right in this hospital. We have to get her to theater now.” She stopped what she was doing and just blinked at us, wide eyed. “It’s a miracle.”

I raced out into the hall, and watched a man wrapped in the world's ugliest poncho walking down the hall, completely unseen by the humans around him. He raised a hand in greeting, but he never turned around and met my eye.

My smile threatened to crack my face in two.

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