Page 22 of Pucking Fate

“And? You two hooked up?”

“We fooled around a little. Over the clothes. Mostly. But that was it.”

“You had fun?” she asks.

“The most fun I’ve ever had with a man.Ever,” I reiterate, smiling with a grin she can’t see. While Christian may be under the impression that I had never had an orgasm before, he’s only half right. I’ve taken care of matters on my own. Tonight was just the first time getting there with a man.

“But? It sounds like there’s a but coming,” Elle remarks.

“We had to be fast since Finley interrupted. We both…enjoyed ourselves. And I told Christian we couldn’t hide in the bedroom together again while he’s awake or Finley will start asking questions.”

“You didn’t rule out after he’s asleep, though?” she catches on easily.

“Right. And Christian seemed agreeable to that idea. While I liked fooling around with him, really liked it, I’m just wondering if I’m being stupid. I know it doesn’t mean anything to him, that he does this sort of thing with lots of women. Tell me I’m being stupid and that I shouldn’t do anything with him again.”

“Why shouldn’t you?”

“Because things are complicated enough as it is with him just finding out he’s Finley’s father. And it could end badly like before, which would hurt Finley.” Rubbing my forehead with my free hand, I say, “I’m an idiot, aren’t I? You can be honest, Elle. That’s why I called you. I need someone to talk some sense into me.”

My brother’s girlfriend laughs. “Maya, I don’t think you’re an idiot. I think it would only be a mistake if you two aren’t on the same page, like if you still have feelings for Christian but he thinks it’s just physical. Do you still have feelings for him?”

“That’s not what tonight was about,” I reply rather than think too hard about the answer to that question. “I know we’re not going to end up back together. It could end badly, which would only hurt Finley. Besides, long distance wouldn’t work with a normal guy, much less a playboy hockey star who travels around the country every week and has beautiful, adoring fans throwing themselves at him.”

“So, it’s just going to be a casual thing during the summer for both of you? There’s no chance that you might move to Greensboro and try to be a couple?”

“I’m going to apply for jobs here. This is where Finley’s friends are and…it’s time for me to take care of myself without relying on Preston’s help. Even if he does own the house.”

“Preston loves being able to help you. It’s what he lives for. You and Finley could never be a burden to him.”

“Even so, I want to try to do this on my own, you know? And if I’m in Greensboro, it’ll be too easy to let my brother be a crutch or get my heart broken again.”

“So, it’s just a casual summer fling with Christian?”

“Yes. That’s all this is or will be.”

“Then I think that if you explain that to Christian and he’s still interested, then there’s nothing wrong with having some adult fun after Finley goes to sleep.”

Nothing wrong unless I start falling for him again, I think to myself, but don’t say.

“If anything, it would be nice to have some experience before I start dating again,” I tell Elle. “Because I do want to date. Finley is still young enough to not know what happens between a man and a woman when they’re dating, and I won’t have to introduce him to anyone unless it starts to get serious. Right?”

“Right,” Elle agrees. “He’s the perfect age that you can trust a sitter to stay with him for a few hours while you do some adulting. There’s no worry about him getting attached to any man you’re seeing until you’re ready to introduce them. Well, other than Christian. When do you plan to tell Finley that he’s his father?”

“I don’t know. I told Christian that I want him to prove to me that he could be a dependable, responsible, father-figure this summer before I tell Finley. Honestly, I’m not sure if that will be long enough for me to trust him.”

“Well, one way to make sure that things stay casual with Christian, and to see how he handles being a father, is to ask him to stay with Finley while you go out for a few hours.”

“Oh. You think I should ask Christian to babysit while I’m on a date?”

“Why not?”

“I can’t…Christian and I can’t do what we did tonight if I’m dating other people.”

“Why not?” Elle asks again. “Unless you want to ensure that he’s not seeing anyone else either…”

I don’t like the idea of Christian fooling around with another woman when he leaves my bed. I don’t like that idea at all.

“You should definitely mention that condition to Christian then, since he requires monogamy to be spelled out in no uncertain terms.”