Page 39 of The Accidental Text

“That’s what all guilty people say,” she points out.

I slump in my seat and Halmoni tsks at me from the kitchen where she’s currently cleaning dishes.

I sit up straight. “It’s kind of a long story.”

“I’ve got all night,” Hannah says, looking me directly in the eyes.

“No, you don’t. You have to go back to work.”

“Fine,” she says, annoyed. “I’ve got thirty minutes. Now, spill.”

I let out a breath. “Fine,” I say, my tone matching her annoyance.

Am I really going to tell her this? I guess I should tell someone. And if it has to be someone, Hannah is my safest space. She probably won’t have me committed. I hope.

“Okay, so remember how I asked my dad to keep my mom’s phone number? Just for a little while?”

“Uh-huh,” she says, giving me a confused look.

“Well, he didn’t.”

“What?” She pulls her chin inward, her face scrunched. “How could he?”

“Right?”

“Well, okay. I mean, I didn’t really get why you wanted tokeep it, but I know Katherine Cooper’s phone meant something to you, so I didn’t question.”

“I can’t really explain it. It was like an extension of her. I know it was dumb.”

“Not dumb. You have to do whatever to cope,” Hannah says.

“Remember you said that, okay?”

Now Hannah looks concerned. “Tell me.”

“So … I didn’t know that my dad had turned off her number, and I knew no one was looking at her phone. So I started texting her.”

“You were … texting your mom.”

“Yes. And it became sort of a journal thing. Or a venting thing. I texted a lot of feelings.”

“You were texting your recently deceased mother’s phone about your feelings.”

“Yes.”

“Right.”

“I know, it sounds a little crazy.”

“I love you, but it soundsa lotcrazy.”

“I didn’t mean for it to happen—it just did.”

“Weren’t you worried about your dad or someone seeing them?”

“Of course. But as time went on and no one did, I just got more confident,” I say with a shrug.

“Right. So … I’m still not understanding how this is about this Chase person.”