Page 15 of Riding Danger

Even though dinner had gone better than I expected, I could still tell that Ethan did not trust me. And I could hardly blame him. I had abandoned his mother when she was pregnant. I never followed up or even tried to find out why she never contacted me. I was so consumed with my career and tryingnot to think about how her blowing me off made me feel that I missed the most important thing. She never actually said anything tome. I just believed what the man promising me fame and fortune told me.

While I understood he made money off of me, after all no one worked for free, I didn’t realize then what I now knew as fact. It was never about me or my interests. It was always about what I could do for him.

I had a five-octave range and I came in a pretty package. That made a lot of people a lot of money. Including me. Yeah, it got me laid and I was never without company or friends and other perks. But in all my time in the entertainment industry, I knew I only had two real friends. Jason Wilder and Layla Dean. Not even my band mates were as close to me as those two.

Jason was the reason I was in Marina De Ferrier. He grew up here and we’d decided to do a mini road trip so he could see his parents or something that involved pancakes. I wasn’t quite sure. He was also the reason I was doing some military obstacle course thing later in the morning.

I was staring into the garden, thinking about how my life became what it was when I heard her voice.

“Okay,” Shiloh called. “I am ready to go.”

I turned around to face her and nearly swallowed my tongue. “You’re going out like that?”

The words slipped out before I had a chance to think better of it.

She lowered head, giving herself a once-over. “What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?”

Nothing. Absolutely nothing if I didn’t mind sporting a hard-on while trying to negotiate some sort of military obstacle course.

The navy blue shoestring bra-top thing was so tight I could see the outline of her nipples. The hem stopped just beforeher waist revealing a delicious slice of creamy skin. Then there were those shorts. Not tight, and they could hardly be described as booty shorts, but they showed off enough leg to trigger memories I thought were long buried.

I moved behind the couch to hide my erection. I was wearing sweatpants which meant nothing stayed hidden, if I wasn’t careful

“Nothing’s wrong. Let’s get going.”

She walked to the fridge and pulled out two transparent bottles. The liquid inside was electric blue.

“Here.” She handed me one of the bottles. “Drink. Trust me, your muscles will thank you. The course is not easy.”

I waited on her porch as she locked the door. I dropped my hand to her lower back as I led her to my car. She didn’t protest and I took that as a good sign.

Once we were on the road, she twisted in her seat, the seatbelt squeezing her breast even more. “So, what did you want to talk about?”

I didn’t know how to soften what I wanted to say so I just blurted what was on my mind. “Last night was the last time I’m sitting around doing nothing and Ethan has to stay with a grandparent.”

“What?”

“That’s not how co-parenting works, Shi.” I kept my eyes on the road. “We may not be a couple, and yeah, that means there will be times when one or both of us want to go on a date, but there was no reason why Ethan had to stay with Tess, last night.”

“Ryder.”

“No, I understand you don’t trust me.” My ego had wrapped itself around that notion at about three in the morning. “Hell, I’m sure you have lots of rules I need to follow and things I need to learn. But I am not going to learn them with him at your mother’s and me in a hotel room.”

“But what if…” she hesitated and I knew what she was about to say was going to hurt. “You don’t know him. And you're right. I don’t trust you. It’s not like you’ve been the most responsible person in the last nine years.”

Yeah, I was right. What she had to say hurt like a mother fucker. And I couldn’t deny what she was saying was true. I had spent the better part of the nine years partying. There was a fair amount of alcohol, and a decent amount of designer drugs, though I had taken nothing more than a beer or whiskey in over three years. Still, it hurt more coming from her.

“You don’t know me, Shi.” And she didn’t. She knew the image Terrence had made sure the press put out there. She saw the curated paparazzi pics, the billboards ads, and red-carpet appearances. That was my business. It was necessary for my career. It had nothing to do with the person I was.

“Correct. I don’t.” She narrowed her eyes, tilting her head to the side as she continued. “And you expect me to leave my son in your care. God, I am a single mom and a cop. Trust is not a commodity I hand out easily.” She turned to face the front once more. “I’m not saying I don’t want Ethan to get to know you, but I cannot be stressing about that while I’m on duty. And until I trust you, that is exactly what would happen.”

She made a fair point. I could not force the trust issue. If she was distracted in the field, something could go seriously wrong. I tried not to focus on how my gut twisted as I thought about everything that could go wrong if she didn’t have her full focus while on duty.

We needed a solution. Not something that would cause her more stress. “What about this? If you have to work the night shift again before you trust me, Ethan and I will go to your mom’s for dinner together.” If I wanted to win this war, I needed to concede a few battles. “I stay there until bedtime. And I go back there in the morning to get him ready for school. And thenI can take him to school instead of Tess. I’m guessing that is the arrangement you have with her?”

Shiloh shook her head. “No. Usually I pick him and drop him off before going home. I asked Tess to take him because you wanted to talk and we have the obstacle thing this morning.”

So, I had stopped her from seeing her kid this morning. That was the last time that happened as well.

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