Page 6 of Love Over Easy

David

My head is pounding and my face feels like it’s the size of a watermelon. I moan as my eyes flutter open. My vision is blurry, but I see the outline of a dark blob bending over me. Small, petite hands roam my body, exploring each of my pockets. Those hands feel good. Soft. Gentle. My cock twitches in my pants. So good. Wait. No, no, no. I can’t be turned on by a felon.

Why am I not completely repulsed when those roving hands move up my body? This is an unwelcome first. I must have been hit harder than I thought. A hand dips into my shirt pocket and that just won’t do. I shake my head to clear my vision and grab the hand to stop whoever the hell this person is from getting the handcuff key.

A high-pitched shriek makes my headache worse. As my eyes come back into focus, I stare up into anxious and concerned blue eyes. I can’t see an entire face due to a black hooded jacket but I know this person is too slight to have taken me down. That doesn’t make me feel any better because somewhere nearby there’s a man with a mean right hook around.

The sweetest voice I’ve ever heard asks, “Are you okay, mister?”

I’m either delirious or it’s a woman which makes me feel marginally better about my previous reactions.

“You were out for about three minutes. How many fingers am I holding up?” she says too loud and too fast for me to comprehend.

I blink and focus on her dainty hand. I think I see three, but they keep moving.

“I’m fine,” I bark and struggle to my feet. It’s not my proudest moment when the woman has to help me stand and then guides me to lean against the house to keep from falling over. My stomach rolls and I swallow to keep from hurling.

She takes something out of her pocket. Not knowing what she’s going for, I try to stop her, but my body doesn’t respond. I wince when she starts to wipe my face. It hurts like a mother-fucker and I push her away.

Her hand immediately drops. “I’m really sorry about that. I didn’t mean to hurt you, but you shouldn’t sneak up on people that way.”

The absurdity of her statement makes me chuckle. “That’s how you catch the bad guys, sweetie. And you are, you know. As if breaking and entering isn’t bad enough, now I get to slap on assaulting an officer. Where’s your accomplice?”

Her head leans to the side and she bites her lip nervously, looking at me as if I were the crazy one. “I don’t have one of those,” she replies.

I snort. She’s going to be a pain and I hurt too much to deal with her shit. “Come on, just tell me, sweetie. Where’s the guy that hit me?”

She puts her prissy little hand on her hip and cocks her head again. Damn, I wish I could see her face. “Listen, I excused your bad behavior the first time you called me that, but now I need to point out I’m not your sweetie.”

Fuck. Her dressing me down is deserved and I have a weird need to kiss her, but as an attorney, I need to remind myself that would be grounds for a whole fuck lot of bad things. I just can’t think clearly at the moment. She has the prettiest nose, or at least what I can see of it from beneath that damn hoodie. I move my jaw back and forth to see if everything is in working order. “Maybe not, but you are my prisoner. Come on.”

I head back toward my house with only a little wobble. I ignore that she has to steady me by taking my left arm. And I also ignore the way my cock is half hard from her touch. The punch obviously still has my brains scrambled. It’s only a ten minute walk. I got this. Maybe.

“Where are we going?” she asks.

Her head just comes to my shoulders. “To jail. Maybe a night in lockup will make you more talkative.”

I keep walking, but she stops, which jerks my arm that’s connected to hers and I wave my free arm to find my balance before I end up on my ass. Again. “What the hell are you doing?” I snap.

It’s too dark for me to see anything more than the reflection of the moon in her eyes as she looks up into mine. “That’s really not going to work for me. Please don’t take me to jail. Can’t we work something out?”

She’s ballsy; I’ll give her that. “Now you want to add prostitution and bribing an office of the law on top of your already long list of no-no’s?”

There goes that hand on her hip again. I bite my lip to keep from smiling when she comes back at me with, “What? I was not suggesting anything like that. You are not a very nice man, mister.”

“Sheriff David Caldwell, ma’am. I thought you’d like to know the name of your jailer, judge, and jury. Now if you’d like to give me the name of the man who hit me, it will go a lot easier for you.”

Her hands draw up into fists by her sides, thumbs out, I notice, which is weird because most women make a fist with their thumb tucked inside their fingers. She gives a frustrated growl and a grin plays at the corner of my lips.

“Are you hard of hearing? I already told you. There is nobody with me. I’m the one who hit you. It was totally your fault for sneaking up on me like that. But…I am sorry you’re hurt. You should really put some ice on that before the swelling gets too bad.”

Of all the things she says, that’s the only truthful thing I pick up on. She really is sorry I’m hurt. I cock a brow and smirk. “Again, I don’t formally announce myself before addressing someone who is breaking into a house. It would totally ruin the element of surprise.”

Once we’re in my driveway, I flip her around and push her stomach and chest against the side of my truck. I might whine just a bit when her round ass comes in contact with my excited—but outta luck—lower extremity. With practiced ease, I unlock the cuffs and secure her hands behind her back. Then I search her for concealed weapons. All I find is a flashlight and that she’s one tightly packaged woman. What I wouldn’t give to see her in a bathing suit…or beneath me wearing nothing at all.

Oh, dear God, I’ve got to stop with these licentious fucked-up thoughts.

I help her in the passenger side of the truck and protect her head as she gets in. Then I lean over her to buckle the seatbelt and accidentally press my chest against hers. If it weren’t unprofessional, I would lean in and sniff her.

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