Page 28 of Baking Battles

“Now, Emi, do you want to watch a really naughty puppy playing with toilet paper?”

“Puppy!!” Emi shouts, and starts jumping up and down on the sofa.

“Then have another piece of satsuma and Uncle Christopher will show you. Here we go.”

It’s funny how Mattias slips so easily into getting Christopher to help. Not that he has to ask, because Christopher just quietly walks past him with a pile of clothes, asking, “Are these okay to dress Emi in?” whilst Mattias jots down measurements on a piece of paper and flicks desperately through his battered old cook book. He knows this stuff, as long as he has yeast and water and flour, he can whip up some decent bread. Flavours are tricky, because he likes his rye to be just that. Rye. He’s also contemplating baking a Swedish-style spiced-raisin loaf, but he hasn’t planned this at all and shoots off a quick email to the purchase team to see if they by any chance have a tin of mead in their chillers. He doesn’t hold much hope, but he can wing it. He thinks.

He’s also weirdly a little freaked out when Christopher shoves a piece of crispbread in his mouth, like he is a toddler, insisting that he needs breakfast and not just coffee. Mattias can quite happily live off coffee on its own, but he supposes Christopher is right. He needs to have a clear head and be firing on all cylinders today, he thinks, as he reluctantly takes a bite of the apple Christopher hands him with a little smile. Like this is normal. Like this is totally normal. It’s not. It’s weird and should be really uncomfortable, and instead, he realises that it’s actually in a way… fun.

They leave with plenty of time to catch the bus, only for Christopher to have a mini freak out at the thought of public transport, and Emi just laughs far too loudly, then tries to climb out of the pram, so Mattias zips his jacket all the way up to his chin, and loudly declares that they’ll have to walk. And that they will be late. And that Christopher needs to chill the fuck out, because nobody has ever died from riding a public transport bus. He shakes his head, and again, questions his own sanity, because, honestly, whatishappening to his life?

Christopher still wins the bus-stop standoff, leaving Mattias to sigh as the bus passes them by, insteadhe grabs the pram, and they walk, in silence, letting the world just pass them by. It’s something he thinks about, as they walk, that nobody even notices them, the two men with the pram. They are all bundled up with hats and scarves covering their faces, and he’s quite sure that nobody would even clock who Christopher is, with everyone keeping their heads down to escape the biting-cold wind, and the snowflakes that are flurrying through the air. Yet, he’s surprised to realise that he feels comfortable. Relaxed, and he has to smile at himself even thinking it. He feels totally at ease, having Christopher by his side. Which brings him back to Sara, because she has always made him feel on edge. Was he dressed right? Was his hair gelled back the way she liked it? Had he brushed his teeth? He can’t actually remember brushing today, but somehow he can’t be bothered to care. He just pushes the pram, and lets himself get swallowed up in the snow and the crowds. A blanket of safety in a way, the three of them in their own private little bubble of life. He looks over and sneaks a quick glance at the man next to him, his nose red from the cold, his eyes squinting under the beanie covering his head. He’s handsome… Mattias assumes. Well, he is traditional looking. Male. Very… He’s all dark stubble and dimples and… then he looks over and smiles and Mattias has to look away. He’s… He can’t describe it. It’s something. Something weird.

He shrugs it all off and keeps walking. So what, if Christopher is attractive? He’s just a bloke, really. Like everyone else, and there is nothing wrong with finding another man good looking. Because Christopher Pedersen is cool. Charming. Funny. Bloody gorgeous.

Mattias has to hide in his scarf again, before Christopher sees his blushing stupid face. Not that he would notice in this cold, he hopes. They just need to get inside so they can calm down and get to work. Nobody will notice shit. Whatever it is that Mattias is trying to convince himself of right now, because he is all flustered and hot, and luckily nobody notices when Mattias wheels Emi’s pram into the back of the studio, finding a quiet corner where the pram can sit undisturbed. Instead Pernille the stylist, just coos and gives Emi a hairbrush to hold as she quickly picks out the clothes earmarked for ‘Strømme, Episode 3’, and snaps a quick photo for the continuity board. The top she gives him is still far too tight, but the jeans fit like a second skin, and will hug his ankles nicely in the boots she places on the ground in front of him.

For a second, he laughs to himself. If Sara could see him now. She always said he needed better clothes. Well, now he looks both pretentious and weird, but whatever. At least no one will recognise him in the street when he mills around in his normal plain clothes hidden in the oversized parka he wears, with his beanie pulled down low over his head.

“Mattias!!”

Caroline’s voice is all excited, the way she speaks when she has gossip. He can still read her like a book. She hasn’t changed at all from years back when she was at TV3 full time. He thinks she might have been a tell-tale and gossip back in the days when she went to school with Sara too, because Oslo may be a major city, but when it comes to people knowing people and having their nose in other people’s business, Oslo is a cesspit of a population, full of gossiping idiots.

“Caroline.” He says, sounding resigned. It’s starting to become old now, this pathetic roundabout of crap. “Yes yes yes, whatever. I’m gay. I probably am. I don’t care and I am really not bothered about it.” He kind of rolls his eyes and Caroline stares at him in shock.

“You’re gay?”

“And?” Mattias just stares at her.

“And you are just telling me now. Here. On a Friday morning like it’s nothing whilst holding a seriously cute baby on your lap. Mattias Strømme. You are officially weird. But then you always have been and I love you, despite the horrible fact that you were with Sara, who is still a bitch, whatever you tell me, and I haven’t forgiven her for all the shit she put you through, but Mattias? You fucking plonker.”

She stops to breathe and Mattias has gone bright red.

“Was that not what you came to ask me? Because everyone else has been asking me this week. It’s like it’s national make ‘Mattias come out of the closet to everyone’ week.”

Mattias Strømme needs to learn to shut his mouth.

“Daddycloset? Papa no go closet.” Emi is trying to stand up on his lap, grabbing at his ears.

“No, Emi, Daddyis not in the closet. Daddyis right here, and we are going to bake some bread! It will be great fun.” Mattias replies, and stares defiantly at Caroline.

“No, I came to ask if you know anything about Jacob Slagsvold. If he’s single. Or not. I was just curious. You know, curious like any single woman would be when there is a seriously hot dude about. I bet he is married to some cool rock-climber chick, who is in tune with nature or something.”

She stops to take a breath, still staring at him like he has two heads.

“You’re gay. Okay.”

“And you want to fu… Eh?” Mattias has to laugh at Emi, who is staring at him like he is expected to tell her something really funny. “So… Caroline? This is my daughter, Emi. Emi, this is Daddy’s friend, Caroline.”

“Sweetie.” Caroline says, and pats Emi on the head, like she’s a doll or something. Which of course makes Mattias think of Christopher again, a little bundle of warmth brewing in his chest, remembering how effortlessly he has looked after Emi this morning. How he had spoken to her like they were best friends and made her laugh. Because Caroline has obviously no idea of how to speak or behave with a toddler. Or it could be that he has just gone and outed himself to her, and she is still in shock.

“So, you want to find out if Jacob Slagsvold is single? Let me give you a hint, Caroline.” He waves her closer, and leans up, so as to whisper in her ear.

“Yes?” Caroline whispers back.

“Go and ask him.” Mattias giggles and she swats at him with both hands, almost losing her clipboard that is tucked under her arm, in the process.

“God, you are still an annoying twat.” she laughs. “Your kid is cute though.”

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