Page 54 of Echoes of a Muted Song

Looking back, I thought of all the shenanigans and hookups he’d seen me engage in, as well as the mischief he’d gotten up to. Like two planets sharing the same orbit, we’d been destined to collide. I was just glad that the explosion had produced sparks of love instead of fury or rivalry, because I don’t think my heart could have handled being in competition with him.

“The first song I soul-deep fell in love with was ‘Unforgiven.’ Everything about it, from thehaunting melody to the gut wrenching words, and man did those words pack a punch in my teen years. It felt like I was always making mistakes, always falling short of the goals I’d set, and always catching shit from the ‘rents and my teachers for not living up to my potential or finding a way to fuck up even the simplest tasks. Oh my gods, that used to piss my old man off. He’d stand there, furiously scowling, reading whatever report had been sent home, or listening to my step-mom ramble on about whatever the hell it was that I’d broken or screwed up, like her kid didn’t fuck up all the time, too. I think that’s why Billy and I have never gotten along, despite spending most of our lives being raised together. I resented the way she always defended him when he fucked up, while never hesitating to throw me under the bus. It always felt like she wanted my old man to love Billy more than he loved me, but the old man wasn’t really capable of loving that way. Like, he was present in our lives and he gave a shit, but he had exacting standards and when I screwed up, and I was always screwing up, I never felt like I could fully erase that in his eyes. Even now, I get this sort of judgy disappointed vibe from him since he can no longer brag that his son is a rock star.Yeah, he’s just managing rock stars now. Like I had a choice. Sometimes, he makes me feel like I failed and got demoted, and that’s why ‘Unforgiven’ still resonates so strongly for me. Because he still looks at me like I’m the sum of all my previous fuckups.”

“What’s he like with Billy?” I asked, because I sensed that there was more to his bitterness and I wanted him to know that I could handle him sharing all his pain and trauma, whatever that might be.

“They’re in the same bowling league, for fuck’s sake. Pops was the one to get Billy his job, and since Billy, his wife and their kids share the duplex with Pops and Billy’s mom, they ride to and from work together, go fishing damn near every weekend, including ice fishing, which I always wanted to try but he’d never do so I had to learn on my own.”

“I’ll go ice fishing with you,” I said, casting a glance over his shoulder to see him smiling at me. “I love ice fishing and I’ve never had the chance to do it in Maine. It would be cool to spend some time cozied up in a fishing shack with you, trying to keep one another warm while we wait for the bait to drown.”

“You know that the point of fishing isn’t to actually drown the bait, right?” he replied. “You’re supposed to rescue the fish.”

“Rescue the fish?”

“Yeah, from growing old and bored swimming around in the same old lake,” he pointed out. “Think about it. By the time they are big enough to be caught and kept insteadof released, they’ve already been in their habitat for long enough to see it all. When I relocate them to the chopping block and then the hibachi, they’re getting a whole new experience.”

“Not sure they are experiencing anything once you chop off their heads,” I pointed out. “Now, if you wanted to get a little pint-sized aquarium so you could carry the first around with you all day without it expiring from lack of oxygen, then yeah, that would be an experience.”

Laughing, he reached for my hand and I let him tug me into his lap, where he brushed a stray lock of hair back from my cheek so he could caress it.

“One of the many, many reasons I love you is that quick, sarcastic whit and the way you just made me feel better without even trying. Promise you’ll never change.”

“I won’t,” I said, but when I tried to cuddle closer he kept me at arm’s length.

“I know that all of our band brothers as well as security and the crew know we’re together, but I got you something that I hope you’ll be okay with wearing, because I want the whole damned world to know you’re mine.”

My heart started tapping out a staccato beat when he reached into his pocket to pull out a long, rectangular-shaped box. What I saw when he took the lid off was an iridescent blueand silver metal collar that, holy shit, he turned it so that a moonbeam hit it and slowly I got to watch the elvish language come to life in fancy glowing script along its surface.

“Holy shit,” I breathed, “What does it say?”

“I’d crawl five hundred miles through the fiery pit, just for five more minutes with you.”

I lost it then, a choked sob spilling from between my lips as I trembled, trying not to shake too much as he leaned in and brushed a kiss over my lips.

“Please say you’ll wear my collar,” he murmured.

“As long as you promise one thing.”

“What’s that?”

“That once you lock it in place, you’ll never take it off me except to replace it with a new one?”

“Ohh, that is an easy promise to make.”

“Then I’ll wear it, in this life and the next one.”

“Works for me,” he murmured as he lowered his lips to mine again. “As long as this one lasts for a very long, long, long ass time.”

“Draven?”

“Huh?”

“Shuddup and kiss me.”

Chapter 26

(Draven)

“Guess you decided that it was my turn to spend a drive curious about where we were going,” I conveyed, my device laying on my thigh as we delt with start and stop traffic.

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