Page 92 of Set In Stone

krystina

“Areyou sure you’ll be okay? I’ll just call off. I don’t want to leave you,” Allyson said. She sat across from me at the kitchen table of the apartment we once sharedtogether.

“You already called in to work yesterday. I don’t want you to get into trouble on my account. I’ll be fine,” I assured her. I picked absently at the buttered wheat toast Allyson had made me for breakfast. She insisted that I eat, but I had zeroappetite.

It had been over two days since I’d seen or spoken to Alexander – two days of agony, worry, and crying. After Hale and I got Alexander to bed on Saturday night, all the strength I displayed at the club left me and I completely broke down. The man I loved, the self-assured, confident, and beautiful man I knew, had been reduced to a hurtful drunk person that I didn’trecognize.

The fact that he went to the club to forget about everything, even me, was almost too much to bear. But the idea of him turning toherripped my heart into a million tinypieces.

Sasha’s words had been on repeat in my mind since thatnight.

“It’s too bad you interrupted us so soon. He would have been fucking me in a matter of minutes. But he’ll be back. They always come back. You’ll never be enough forhim.”

Deep down, I knew I got there before anything happened between the two of them. However, I couldn’t help but wonder about what she said and about what would have happened if I didn’t arrive in time. I also worried that her words about me not being enough for him rang true. Alexander said that he didn’t need the club as an outlet anymore, but what if hedid?

Because of that, and because of the way he had deliberately tried to hurt and frighten me, I needed time to think. Hale understood this and offered to keep watch over him on Saturday night. He suggested that I go to Allyson’s for the night, so I did. Although, one night ended up turning into three. Now, it was Tuesday morning, and I had yet to hear from Alexander. There had been no phone calls from him. No texts. No emails. Justnothing.

“Anything new from Hale or Justine?” Allysonasked.

“Not yet today,” I responded. “The last text from Hale came last night. He said that Alex was okay and was still sorting thingsout.”

“Yeah, well he’d better sort out some kind of apology to you soon before I get my hands on him. I still can’t believe he hasn’t returned yourcalls.”

“Me either, Ally,” I saidsadly.

My eyes burned, threatening a new wave of tears. I didn’t want to worry Allyson anymore, so I blinked them back, surprised that I even had any tearsleft.

“I’m going to stay home today,” Allyson insistedagain.

“Ally, don’t be ridiculous. I feel guilty enough over the fact that I’ve called in to work two days in a row. Don’t add to it. I’ll be okay, really. In fact, I’m going to shower and try to get some work done from hometoday.”

I didn’t add that the reason I wasn’t going into the office was because I couldn’t risk running into Alexander. She already knew that. I wasn’t avoiding him, but simply doing as requested. According to Hale and Justine, Alexander needed space. If that’s what he needed, I could give it – even if it killed me in the process. I just hoped he didn’t need space for too much longer. As upset as I had been, I missed him so much. Every time my eyes closed, he was there. I felt empty without him, lost in a black hole of misery. I wasn’t sure if I could go on living this way for muchlonger.

“Promise to call if you need me? Even if you just have to cry it out for a minute, I’ll listen,” Allyson said, her expression full ofworry.

“I promise. Now get out of here before you’re late,” Iscolded.

“Love you, doll,” she said, her voice full of compassion. Coming around to my side of the table, she gave me a fierce hug. Once she broke away, she walked to the front door and grabbed her coat off the wall hook. “He’ll come around. I know he will. He loves you too much notto.”

I smiled weakly ather.

“Iknow.”

After she left, I sluggishly made my way back to my old bedroom. I glanced at the foot of the bed and saw my laptop sitting open. Waiting. Just waiting for Alexander to respond to my email. While he hadn’t responded to any of my texts, maybe he had too much to say and replied to my email instead. Hoping for a response, I sat on the edge of the bed and opened myinbox.

Nothing.

What if he misunderstood what I said? Had I said the wrong things? Should I have saidmore?

I knew I should have followed him when he left the nursing home. I never should have let him go off alone, but I didn’t know if he understood my regret. Feeling unsure about the words I had written, I clicked on the email that I sent to him on Sundaynight.

To: AlexanderStone

From: KrystinaCole

SUBJECT: I’msorry

Alex,

---