Page 61 of Heart of Stone

Why couldn’t I have chosen to take a crack at a normal guy?

There had plenty of opportunities over the past couple of years, yet I had chosen to get back in the game with a man that was anything but ordinary.

Only I would choose Mr. Danger-licious.

But, despite the many uncertainties that I felt, the sheer idea of submitting myself to Alexander sparked a dark edge of desire that I didn’t know I possessed. It stirred in the depths of my belly, diffusing a warm tingle throughout my body whenever I was near him. There was no denying how much I desperately wanted him and my little devil friend began to construct a red and white striped tent around the disapproving angel in preparation for a full-blown circus.

However, before I became a showgirl for Barnum and Bailey, I needed to find out exactly what he wanted me to submit to.

What things did he want to do to me? Why couldn’t civilized people talk about them?

But I was afraid to voice my questions. Instead, I evaded.

“It’s only sex, Alexander. People talk about it all the time,” I said weakly.

He lowered my feet to the floor, shifted his chair closer to mine and rested his hand on my knee. He looked down and shook his head, like he was frustrated with me for some reason.

“Look, I’m sorry. This is a lot to process,” I said, feeling defensive. “I’ve never done anything like this before. Casual sex isn’t something I normally do, which makes me worry about what I’m getting myself into. My experiences are pretty limited.”

“Exactly how limited, Krystina?” he asked, lifting his head to reveal troubled eyes.

I tried to decide how much to tell him. My only real partner had been Trevor. The sex was good, but nothing kinky. In fact, I wasn’t even sure if I experienced a true orgasm with him. From the way I’ve heard Allyson talk, an orgasm was the most mind-blowing thing ever. I suddenly felt like a babe in the woods.

“Well, there was Trevor. I dated him for a couple of years. But then he cheated on me, and well…let’s just say that it ended bad. Really bad.”

Alexander leaned forward in his chair, eyes dark and narrowed into slits.

Well, that’s interesting…does that bother him?

“Is that why you don’t trust me?”

“I don’t know you, Alex.”

“Okay, fair enough. But tell me this, how was the sex between you and your…ex?” he asked, obviously choosing not to say Trevor’s name. I felt color surge into my cheeks at his forwardness.

“It was okay,” I answered shyly, with a little shrug of my shoulders.

“You say it so casually. Was the sex good, or wasn’t it?” he pushed further.

“I don’t know how you expect me to answer that. I don’t know – it was sex. What else can I say about it?” I said meekly.

“Krystina, don’t be daft. Did you orgasm with him or not?”

Again, his brusqueness threw me off guard. My cheeks flushed a deeper crimson, the heat spreading to the tips of my ears, and I was embarrassed to say that I didn’t know.

“These are really personal questions and the answers are none of your business,” I responded quietly.

“Last night we agreed to no games, remember? I’m giving you brutal honesty and I expect the same in return. Like you, I alsoneed to know what I’m getting myself into. Talk to me, Krystina,” he demanded.

“I don’t know, okay! I don’t know!” I exclaimed, my embarrassment reaching an unparalleled level.

“That’s typical,” he frowned and leaned back in his chair, folding his arms in a display of obvious disgust. “Most college boys don’t know what to do with a woman. What about your other experiences?”

“There was this other guy, but that was nothing,” I dismissed.

“What other guy?”

“Nobody, just a guy.”

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