Page 41 of Two Chambered Heart

“No reason to thank me,” he said smugly, taking another sip of coffee, savouring the rich caramel notes.

“I’m going to run today. I’d like to get back into it. Before I… well, before, I used to run almost every day. Honestly, I felt like I was going crazy without running.”

Kayden hesitated for a minute, looking out at the skyline—the sun was shining and there wasn’t a cloud for miles. Jase was right. It was a beautiful day. He had too much anxious energy burning through him, and a run andfresh air would do him some good. He needed to focus on something other than all the things that could go wrong for Jason.

“Do you want to run outside?” he asked, before he could stop himself.

Corey’s eyes widened only a fraction before they sharpened. “Alone?”

“No, with me.”

“Sure.” She shrugged her shoulders, trying to act like it meant nothing, but he could see the desperation in her eyes. He would give her anything, do anything to please her. He was already lost to her.

“I usually drive out to a trail when I run, but let’s stay in the city today. I want to be close to home.”

The two of them finished their coffee in relative silence, Corey watching Kayden as he moved around the kitchen, making them a smoothie.

When he was done cleaning the blender, she broke the quiet.

“What’s the deal with you suffocating me during sex? Is that like your kink or something?”

“Erotic asphyxiation is technically classified as paraphilia, but sure, we can call it a kink.”

“Is that why you asked if I could handle you? On the rooftop?”

“Partially, yes.”

“What do you get out of it?”

“Well, it’s twofold. It’s not only what I get out of it, but what it gives to my partner. I saw what it did to you when I had my hand on your throat. To be honest, I was waiting for you to panic, but you didn’t.”

“I’ve never gotten high before, but both times, it kind of felt like Iwashigh. It felt… good. Really good?”

“That’s normal with breath play. It’s one of the big reasons people get into it. When the air supply is cut off and oxygen to the brain is restricted, the body goes into panic mode. But then when the pressure is released and you can breathe again, your brain pumps out dopamine, serotonin and endorphins. Asphyxiation alone may not do anything in itself, but whenit’s compounded with your hormones during sex, physiologically, it creates more of a rush. I hear it’s rather exhilarating.”

“And for you, you get the control?”

“I like the control, yes, but I also like the trust I get from my partner. Given your history, I wouldn't have expected you to give up control like that. It was a pleasant surprise.”

“Do you need that level of control to get off?”

“Mostly.”

“Why?”

“I’m sure there’s some deep-seated psychological reason behind it, but I’d rather not get into that conversation right now.”

“Well, too bad for you, because I’d like to.”

Kayden sighed. Maybe he owed her more of an explanation if she was going to keep participating, but it was a hard conversation to have, and something he didn’t like to think about. From his perspective, so long as he was with consenting women and he was being careful, there was no harm in it.

“I didn’t have any control over my life when I was growing up. Maybe this is how it’s manifested.” It was a cop-out, not really a proper answer, but she seemed to accept it as enough.For now.

Corey put her hand on his lap, squeezing his thigh.

“I didn’t have a lot of control in my life either, but I also didn’t really have anyone I could trust. It feels good to trust you. Like you said, it was exhilarating—almost freeing, like in that moment, I didn’t have to fight. I could just trust that someone else would keep me alive. Thatyouwould keep me alive. I’ve never had that before.”

Kayden’s throat tightened and he let out a long breath, the emotion that had been simmering in him reaching its boiling point. That was another thing he loved about breath play with partners, their willingness to put their life in his hands. That trust was immeasurable, and having it from Corey made it that much sweeter.

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