Page 61 of Blind Attraction

He moved further down the page to an earlier post—Fractured, Not Broken.Underneath the heading was another photo of Alana. Her eyes glistened, a single tear streaked down her cheek as she focused to the side of the camera. The background blurred behind her and even with anguish distorting her features, she still took his breath away.

“Wow, kinda grips you by the balls, doesn’t it,” Blake murmured.

Mitch frowned and wriggled his nose, trying to dislodge the unwelcomed tingle. His sight blurred and he blinked to regain focus. The weight of regret increased, squashing his lungs. How would he get through this? He hadn’t even boarded the jet from Richmond before doubt started to gnaw at his insides. He hadn’t realized how much their time together had affected him. Well not until it was too late, anyway.

Before he chickened out, he clicked on the link to the last post and placed the curser in the comment section.I miss you, Allie.He typed his name with shaky hands then pressed submit, not allowing himself time to contemplate his actions.

“What are you doing?” Blake leaned closer, rubbing his shoulder. “Oh, no you didn’t.”

Mitch shot him a glare. “What? I wanted to send her a message to let her know I’m thinking about her.”

“Stalker.” Mason chuckled. “Hang up calls, tracking her down online… You sure you don’t have a pair of her panties hidden under your pillow?”

Mitch wished.

“I just want to know if she’s all right.”

He needed to reach out. Maybe his conscience wouldn’t allow him to move on because their farewell had been hostile. He never wanted to hurt her. Her future happiness had always been the reason for the decisions he made. Ending things on bad terms had almost killed him. Nothing felt right anymore. With Alana his life was full.

Now…now nothing mattered.

He didn’t want to smile, he didn’t want to perform, he didn’t even have the motivation or desire to get drunk and screw around with groupies.

He was broken.

Lost.

And unlucky for him, he’d thrown away the only thing able to turn his life around.

* * *

Alana had done a great job occupying herself for the last ten days, yet every so often she needed to stop and breathe and think.

Those were the times when Mitchell invaded her thoughts and wouldn’t let go.

The day after his rejection had been the worst. She’d woken to the sound of Kate’s shrill voice echoing up the hall. Reckless Beat’s interview with the breakfast talk show blared on the television and apparently waking Alana required the call of a banshee.

She’d shuffled into the lounge room, her mind still half asleep as she listened to him announce to the world that she was a ‘distraction’. His words not only fractured the cracks in her heart, they smashed her wide open, exposing her heartbreak to anyone who cared to notice. She’d foolishly thought he’d been too scared to fall in love, or commitment might’ve been the issue. Now she knew better.

A distraction. Christ.

At least it turned her mood from weighty despair to energized fury. She wanted to remind him that she never asked for his help. He’d pushed to be her knight in shining armor, not the other way around. Only she didn’t have his phone number to give him a piece of her mind. He’d conveniently taken hers and not shared his in return.

“Are you still staring at his message?” Kate walked into Alana’s bedroom and peered down at her computer screen.

Alana sighed and read the line again.I miss you, Allie.“I can’t help it.” Anger had been her constant companion. Finding the comment only made things worse, ripping her to pieces all over again.

Talk about a damn distraction.

She started the blog the night he left Richmond. She couldn’t sleep, couldn’t eat, so she threw herself into work. A new blog, a new life, a new outlook. Only Mitchell ruined that too.

“Delete it.”

Alana nodded. She should, yet what she really wanted to do was re-wallpaper her room with those few simple words. “I’m going to remove it all. The whole blog. Every post.”

“What? No way! I’m not letting you do that.”

“No.” She inhaled deep, filling her lungs for strength. “I need to. I started the blog to get over him, and it worked for a while but now every time I check my email I wonder if he’s left another message. And every time I start another post I wonder if he’ll read it.” She turned to Kate and gave a sad smile. “I need to delete the whole damn thing.”

---