Page 87 of Inarticulate

Only this time he didn’t respond.

She yanked on her pants and blouse, then inched her head out of the bathroom. Her pulse spiked for a moment, waiting for him to jump out at her, to shove her against the closest wall and steal her breath with his kiss. But he didn’t. There was no sound of footfalls, no television, only the crackle of the fire from the main room.

“Keenan?” She padded through the bedroom to find him motionless on the couch.

He was sitting upright, his head resting against the back of the sofa like he’d sat down and instantly became overwhelmed with exhaustion.

“I didn’t realize you were so tired,” she whispered, creeping closer. “Did I steal your stamina, grandpa?”

His lips kicked, the tiniest grin announcing his consciousness. She’d learned to recognize his fake smiles, the ones he gave to placate strangers. But this was one of hers. He gave her patented grins and smirks. Ones exclusively made for her.

“Is it time for your nap?” She stopped in front of him and squealed when he leapt at her, pulling her down to be mercilessly tickled.

“Don’t!” She screamed and wiggled for her life. “Please!”

He ended the torture with a kiss, tangling their tongues, combing his hands through her hair. When he backed away, she whimpered, still unable to come to terms with never being sated. No matter how much he gave, she wanted more. More kisses, more affection, more attention. She didn’t think she would ever get enough. At least not in the weeks she had left.

“Is that all I get?” She pouted.

He guided her to straddle his thighs, his heavy-lidded eyes staring back at her. There was no lust, no carnality. He was devoid of energy.

“Youareexhausted.” She cupped his cheeks, taking in his heavy breathing and pale skin. “Are you getting sick?”

He shook his head, the movement slow and unconvincing.

“Then what’s wrong?”

He reached for his cell on the armrest and typed with a smirk—You’re killing me. I can’t keep up with you.

“Really?” She rocked slowly against his crotch, proving otherwise. “I don’t think all of you agrees.”

He gave a breath of a chuckle and closed his eyes, letting his head fall back against the sofa.

“Keenan?”

Something was wrong. A slowly building throb of guilt started to take over her chest. She should’ve been paying more attention. She should’ve noticed sooner. He’d been less energetic for days. Their nights had begun ending earlier, the mornings starting later. She’d vaguely laughed at the idea that his fatigue may be a case of too much horizontal exercise and not enough sleep. But this was more than that.

He wrapped his arms around her and continued to rest.

“Would you tell me if something was wrong?”

His eyes opened and a lack of reassurance stared back at her, the same wariness she’d come to expect when she pried.

He shook his head. “Nothing is wrong.” He brushed the stray hair behind her ear and smiled. “Tired.”

He was lying. Placating her.

She knew better than to fight for answers. He never caved to her determination. He only ever told her what he wanted her to know. Even though these moments had begun to fade, it was that stubborn secrecy that had made her cling tight to the words her heart wanted to give to him. Three little words she’d never spoken because she wouldn’t release her last shield against vulnerability if he wouldn’t either.

But she could give him something. A tiny piece of her that nobody else had. “You know, I never thought I’d care about a man, the way I do for you.”

His eyes softened, the tiniest spark of understanding gleaming back at her.

“My father left when I was a teenager. For me, it was out of the blue. I didn’t see it coming. I didn’t even know there was a problem in my parents’ marriage. He just left. One day he was my father, the next he wasn’t. He never called. Didn’t write…” A gentle hand swept her hair behind her ear, comforting the memories she usually chose to ignore. “I didn’t think it affected me much. I was leaving school at the time and starting my career. I kept myself busy and pretended it was a part of growing up.”

But it wasn’t normal, and it had affected her. How else could she explain the lack of love in her life? She’d broken contact with Dominic, wasted time on relationships she knew had no future, and cocooned herself in a safe existence.

“I’ve never had this.” She waved a lazy hand between them. “I’ve never felt like this.”

---