Page 30 of Desired By Eros

“Well, do you want me to?”

“I…I guess.” A million questions filled her mind. Her fingers itched to reach for her phone, to log on to Aspie Forum and read the page she had saved from a few days ago.

“Here we are,” Eros announced as they reached the door of the pack house. “So, I’ll see you at brunch tomorrow?”

“You’re coming?” Her heart hammered in her chest.

“Of course, why wouldn’t I?”

“Agnes didn’t invite you.”

“And so?” He grinned at her. “I’ll come by here at nine twenty-five sharp.” With a wave, he turned on his heel and strode off.

Her fingers drummed lightly on her thighs as she dashed inside, racing up to her room. Sitting on the bed, she took her phone out and opened Aspie Forum on her browser to her last search.

A friend is someone…

Her eyes moved along the words, ticking off boxes as she read the list, her fingers tightening on her phone. In the last couple of days, and after tonight, he ticked off more of those boxes, plus a few more things that weren’t on the list.

Does that mean he was also more than a friend?

Does he like me?

While some might think people with autism didn’t have sex or weren’t interested in it, that was far from the truth. In fact, Psyche liked sex. In college and grad school, she had had several lovers. However, she had been more interested in thephysical aspect of sexual intercourse, plus the health benefits. In bed, there were no words to be misconstrued or subtle actions she had to decipher. Everything was straightforward—you liked something or you didn’t, it felt good or it didn’t, it got you off or it didn’t. She’d never really spent extended time with the guys she slept with outside of the bedroom, as she had been focused on her studies.

A different thought entered her mind, and she typed a different query.

What is a boyfriend?

As the checklist came up, she realized that it was quite similar to the “friend” list, but with a few more items:

Physically affectionate with you

Wants to spend significant time with you

Protective or concerned for your physical, emotional, and mental well-being

Wants exclusivity and only wants to be with you

Communicates thoughts and feelings and concerns with you

Sexually intimate with you

Wants to know what makes you comfortable

Puts your well-being above theirs

Plans for the future with you

Eros was certainly checking off some of those boxes. He had been quite touchy with her, which she didn’t mind. Even thoughhe didn’t have to come to dinner, he went with her anyway. Then, he walked her all the way back to the pack house as he was concerned for her safety.

Didhe like her? In that way?

She supposed there was one way to find out. So, the following day, as they walked to the parking lot where the Alaska pack kept their communal vehicles, she asked him.

“Eros, do you like me?”

His normally confident stride stuttered as he tripped over his feet. Thankfully, he managed to balance himself before he fell over. “I beg your pardon?”