Page 45 of Breaking Rules

“I didn’t have keys with me.” I sigh. “And I didn’t have any other choice at two in the morning, so he let me sleep in his guest room.”

“He’s a good friend, and you seem to have grown on him.”

At his words, a heat that has nothing to do with Jake or the way he’s holding me rushes through my veins. The memories of Xander set my skin aflame.

“Where were you today?”

“I hadn’t seen Aunt Millie in forever, so I went over there.” I close my eyes, trying to force myself to enjoy the way his thumb caresses my skin. “She says hi.”

“Was Ben there?” He pulls back, startling me.

I give him an awkward smile. “Yeah.”

He shakes his head. “He never liked me.”

A pang of guilt hits me, making me grimace. “Unfortunately.”

I’m tempted to ask him about what Ben told me today, about the frenemies situation and Jake’s broken nose. But if I bring it up now, it’ll only lead to an argument.

“It’s kinda strange, you know? I’ve never wronged him.” He pulls me onto his lap so I’m straddling his legs. “Why do you think he doesn’t like me?”

With one hand on his chest, I pull back and arch a brow. “You really don’t know why?”

For a moment, he frowns, then a look of understanding crosses his features. “It’s because of our breakup in high school. Isn’t it?”

“Not so much the breakup but what you didafterthat. For someone who claimed to be crazy in love with me, you moved on incredibly fast.”

That part of our past doesn’t bother me. I’m the one who ended things. He was leaving for school, and I didn’t want to hold him back. So I made the decision for both of us, and, in all honesty, it was the right choice.

“You know I didn’t date anyone in college.” He drinks me in, his expression lascivious as he grips my hips hard. “It was just sex; my heart has always belonged to you.”

My stomach drops. “Liar.” Just the other day, when he mentioned his rivalry with Xander, he said it was because he dated a girl Xander liked.

Before I can call him out, he pulls me in, his lips covering mine. He slips his tongue into my mouth, deepening the kiss. But that unease niggles at me, making it impossible to lose myself in the desire that usually flares to life when he touches me.

“Jake…” I breathe as he kisses my jaw.

“Babe, I don’t want to talk anymore. I want you,” he murmurs, his hot breath on my skin.

“You said you dated a girl Xander liked,” I blurt out.

Abruptly, he pulls back, his eyebrows pinched together. “Er, what?”

“You told me the two of you liked the same girl, that she chose you. That you were dating.” I study him, watching his reaction, noting the way he rapidly blinks. “You said you dumped her. But in order for you to break up with someone, you need to date them. Right?”

“Theoretically, yes, but–er, it was just…sex?” His tone is full of uncertainty, his eyes pleading with me to drop the subject. “It was nothing serious. I slept with her, went on a few dates. I didn’t consider her my girlfriend.”

Jake has always been a terrible liar. He’s too vague, and when I fish for details, it’s nearly impossible for him to provide them; he can say one thing, then totally contradict himself later. I’ve caught him in lies more than once, but they’ve always been innocent, so they were easy to disregard. This one, though, is much harder to minimize.

“What’s with all the questions? My college days are in the past. You’re my future.” He sits up on the couch, taking my face in his palms. “You’re the only person I want. I love you.”

It’s not the first time Jake has told me he loves me, and yet I can’t find it in me to say it back. It’s as if my heart is full of ice, incapable of love, yet I crave it. It’s been my drug of choice since I realized my own mother doesn’t hold an ounce of love for me.

Maybe if I tell him I love him, it will get easier. Maybe I’d believe it.

“I…I love you too.” The lie slips out easily, yet nothing inside me changes. It’s like paying the utility bills every month. Mundane. A task to be crossed off a list.

“Isabella.” His voice cracks as he inches closer to me. He stares at me, as if he’s afraid to blink. With his mouth a hairsbreadth from mine, he runs his tongue over my bottom lip, and I suck in a breath.