Page 112 of The Witch and His Crow

The feeling that followed was a full body rush of euphoria. It started where his lips pressed into mine, then quickly rushed over my entire body, cleansing me of all the negative feelings I had just been captive to. I leaned into him, his cool exhale singing a song of his desire for me.

Without taking my mouth from his, I knelt up and leaned into him. My chest pressed to his chest until I felt his heartbeat. In fact, I could feel the quickening pace of his heart through the tips of his fingers, his chest, his mouth. Mine seemed to catch it, joining in tandem, until we were one.

Arwyn was careful, taking the kiss slowly. Although his eyes were closed, I kept mine open. I wanted to take in his reactions, wanted to memorise this moment. Because he was my choice.

My mouth parted, allowing enough room for my tongue to enter the fray. It pressed against Arwyn’s closed-mouth kiss. He required little encouragement to copy. Everything about him was careful and poised. As though he followed my lead out of respect, although I knew the true beast that lurked beneath. In a sense, I wanted all of him now. He could take me in the middle of this Trial and I wouldn’t stop him. But there was a peace that came from the soft kiss, the tangle of tongues and the way our heads titled to accommodate the deepening pressure of our mouths against each other.

It was everything.

Hewas everything.

I drew back for breath, lips tingling.

‘Better?’ Arwyn said, his expression almost nervous.

‘Much.’

‘Good. I’m glad you can find service in me.’ Arwyn said, although his expression suggested otherwise. He didn’t smile, not as I did. Instead, he looked down to his hands as though he regretted the moment.

‘I don’t believe you,’ I said, clutching my limp arm.

Arwyn pushed himself to standing, leaving me kneeling on the ground. He plucked the athame from the ground, focusing on cleaning the blade more than me. ‘We need to get out of this maze, Hector. Then we can talk more about it afterwards.’

‘About what?’ My hackles rose as I struggled to get up. ‘How is it that every time we share a moment of intimacy, you treat me like a regret afterwards? Because forgive me, Arwyn, I see through your bullshit. You act distant, but you can’t hide your true emotions from me. I can read them in the intensity of your eyes, or how whenever you touch me, it’s like you’re holding onto something that could blow away at any moment.’

‘That’s because you will,’ Arwyn snapped, regret hanging heavy in his eyes. He took a few deep breaths, steadying himself, this time refusing to break our eye contact. ‘There’s a tempest coming, Hector. One that I’ll not be able to protect you from.’

‘I can look after myself,’ I said. ‘That isn’t what I want from you.’

‘Then what do you want from me?’

I said the very same thing Arwyn had said to me. The word Salem ruined for me. But this was me taking back that power. ‘Everything.’

I’d backed him into a corner. Arwyn knew that as I used his words against him. ‘What I want, and what I deserve are two completely different things.’

‘How about I be the one to determine if you deserve me or not.’

Arwyn swallowed deep. I could see that he wrestled with a response, but instead of offering me one, his eyes fell on my arm. ‘I can help with that.’

He swept behind me, moving quickly, too quickly so I couldn’t refuse him. ‘You cannot run from this conversation forever, Arwyn.’

‘I know,’ he said. I couldn’t see his face, but I knew from his tone alone that he would be frowning. Never had I heard a grown man sound so defeated—so sad.

Before I could press further, Arwyn grasped my arm and twisted it back into place. The pain was sudden and hot, like an inferno that swept over me. But the relief was stronger. I rolled my arm back, recognising the ache but glad I could have the use of both my arms again.

He patted my back, his hand lingering on me for just a moment longer than natural. ‘There you go.’

‘What’re you so frightened of, Arwyn?’ I asked, looking back at him. It was like clutching onto straws that kept disintegrating in my grasp.

‘The truth,’ Arwyn replied, looking to the path of the maze. ‘It scares the shit out of me, if I’m honest.’

Was that what Arwyn had been running from? The maze showed our greatest fears, I knew that. But it was Salem who told me how to get out of it.

‘Face your fears,’ I said, my tone desperate and commanding. ‘That’s how we get out of here.’

Just as I said it, the swirling mist gathered into a figure in the distance. Once again, I saw my mother. She stood, gesturing forme to come to her, to join the chase once again. I fixed my eyes on her, sensing the sting of tears in my throat. My immediate urge was to run after her, but that was what the maze expected.

I had to prove I truly had the power to protect myself from my fears. That I was stronger than the maze believed, and I could prove that with action.

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