Page 50 of A Deception of Courts

“Price you had to pay, what does that mean?” Elinor reached out for my hand, but I flinched away at her touch.

“What have you done, Robin?” Shock dripped from Lyra’s tongue as she questioned me.

Lifting my chin, I forged my expression to a mask of iron and replied, “I’m not the only one in this room who’s had the pleasure of making deals with the Asps. I couldn’t offer them coin, but I could provide them with security. Imeria belongs to them now, not me.”

“You threw away your kingdom, and for what?” Lyra blinked as she spoke.

“A castle, not a kingdom. I gave away a place of stone that meant nothing to me. And now I have an entire nest of Asps at my disposal, close enough to call on if and when required. I think, given my options, it was the best I could do. We all have a price to pay, and this was mine.”

I waited for them to argue. To tell me I had made a terrible choice and to demand I claim it back. But they didn’t. Neither Elinor nor Lyra provided judgement. I waited and waited, but it did not come as words. However, the look they both gave me spoke volumes. Lyra’s eyes were overwhelmed with disbelief and fury, whereas Elinor regarded me with understanding.

“Speak with the Nephilim,” Lyra said finally. “As Robin has said, let us deal with Aldrick before any more lives are lost. Then we will discuss what it means to be king and how best to make a decision in the future.”

Her words stung far greater than any slap.

“Lyra, that is not a fair assumption,” Elinor said.

“I am merely responding to facts, Elinor.”

It was as though someone had stabbed me in the gut and turned the knife.

“I’m sorry, Lyra.” I stood, body shivering with unspent tension. “Do you care to remind me what you have done in your attempts to free the fey that belonged to your court?” Anger twisted inside me, a cold blizzard of fury. “If I am not mistaken, you were complacent as the fey disappeared over the years, whereas I was not.”

Elinor stood and moved from the table next, and I followed suit. “Please, that is enough.”

“I do not deny that your actions have been valiant, but wearing the crown means you make a decision that benefits the many and not the few.” Lyra drew back, her posture rigid from the same tension that thrummed through me. “Remember that the next time you make decisions.”

“How about you tell that to the Cedarfall fey who fill this camp? Explain the meaning behind that to them and see if they understand why it took years to save them,” I snapped.

Lyra didn’t reply. I saw in the creases that spread across her forehead that she had something to say. Whatever it was, it never left her pale mouth. Before I could retract my words, Lyra bowed and left the tent swiftly, not without leaving a scolding kiss to the air around me.

I was left looking out after her, hating the internal, scoring pain born from knowing I’d disappointed her.

“I believe the decisions you make are for the best of not only your people but you, too, Robin,” Elinor said softly, laying the motherly touch of her hand upon my shoulder. “You are the heart of this court regardless of the crown you wear or the throne you sit upon. You should also remember that.”

I leaned into her, resting my head on her shoulder. Her arm dropped around me, keeping me close. I allowed myself a moment of selfish indulgence. Closing my eyes, I imagined my father and how similar his caring affection was to what Elinor provided me.

“Thank you for having faith in me,” I said. “Even if my decisions don’t make sense to you, they make sense to me.”

“And what matters is you stand by those decisions.” Her hand rubbed slowly at my back. Up and down. Elinor’s fingers glowed golden as they dampened the turmoil of emotion, untying it from its knot within me. Clarity overcame me so suddenly that my intake of breath was the freshest and lightest it had been in months.

“I can speak on behalf of your mother when I say that she would be so proud of you,” Elinor said. “Take that, keep it close, and remember it with what is coming.”

“From the moment this all began, I’ve been lost. Lyra sees that.”

“We all feel lost sometimes, Robin,” Elinor admitted. “Recognising that is the first step back toward finding your way out of the maze.”

I closed my eyes, allowing her words to settle over me like snow, where they then melted into my bones.

“Don’t fear the journey. Feel privileged you are on one. Many have already lost their chance to live. In their honour, ensure you make a difference. Live the life they are no longer fortunate to have, continue the Icethorn legacy so we can save its future against our new threat.”

CHAPTER 15

I found my friends by following the outburst of drunken laughter through the camp. The tent they were huddled within rumbled with the sound, and I paused outside for a moment, letting their glee sink into my bones and rid the horrible feeling left over after my audience with the queens.

My hesitation lasted a moment before I swept in to join them. As I pulled open the entrance, I was hit with a wave of warmth mixed with strong alcoholic spirits. My eyes practically stung as I entered, but my mouth watered with the need for my own drink.

The commotion of my arrival did little to conceal Kayne’s reaction when I announced myself. I’d seen his smile which faded when he saw me. And since then, Kayne had stayed silent, lips barely twitching as I fell into conversation with them all.

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