Page 73 of Justice for Radar

Radar squeezed the top of my thigh under the table and I glanced at him and smiled.

“You guys don’t have to do that,” I said, taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly. “I suppose I should try his brother Thomas one more time.” I shook my head. “I know he’s busy, but it’s been over a year.”

“Fuck him,” La Croix rumbled.

“I’m inclined to agree, babe. If Tommy boy ain’t brought his ass down to sort his brother’s shit by now, it’s yours.”

“No, I know, I mean I don’t know the legality of any of it,” I said, shaking my head.

Atlas barked a laugh and I blinked.

“What’s in his last will?” Collier inquired coolly.

“I – I don’t know. I mean, I don’t know if he changed it or anything. I mean, I don’t honestly know what to do about any of it. I’ve just been trying to survive paycheck to paycheck, you know?”

“Yeah, well those days are fast approaching an end,” Radar said with certainty. “That is,” he backtracked, “if you’ve thought any about my offer.”

I looked to him and searched his eyes and finally, I nodded.

“I hate it here,” I said. “I don’t really feel like I can start my life over while I’m stuck in that house, you know?”

“Wait, you’re still living in the house where it happened?” Collier asked. He gave a low whistle. “You got a big brass pair, don’t ‘cha, darlin’?”

I blinked, “I mean, not really,” I said. “Where else was I supposed to go?”

“What do you mean?” Atlas asked.

“I mean, I have no rental history. Everything was always in Rodney’s name… my name is on the house, sure, but half of it is still his and I didn’t know anything about the whole process of buying the house it was just ‘get me these documents’ and ‘sign those documents’ he handled everything for the most part. I was just in charge of packing and unpacking. Choosing furniture and making sure my money was being automatically deposited into our bank account for bills and such. He kept track of every purchase and told me how much I was allowed to spend where.”

“Jesus, control freak much?” Radar muttered.

I nodded.

“He said he didn’t want me to screw it up.”

“What a fucking cock goblin,” Collier muttered, and I snorted.

“Well, if he wasn’t before prison he sure as fuck is now,” Atlas declared, and I know it was awful of me but I had to laugh. I just had to. Radar raised his bottle and everyone else raised theirs and me my glass and we sort of toasted that one.

“Y’all going out there tomorrow?” Collier asked, and Radar and Atlas exchanged a look.

“Wait, are you?” I asked, looking from one to the other of them.

Both of them sort of clammed up and Collier said, “My apologies, gentlemen,” before he turned to me and said, “I spoke out of turn.”

“That’s not for you to know, baby,” Radar said gently and massaged the top of my thigh.

The problem was, that I wanted to know… I wanted to know very badly but looking at the men from the other club sitting opposite me, Radar, and Atlas I decided that discretion was the better part of valor and muttered complacently, “I understand.”

Radar hooked a hand behind my head and pulled my temple to his lips and kissed me firmly muttering,“Good girl,”in my ear anddamnit, why did that have such an effect on me?

I felt my breath catch as I was suffused with a tingly warm glow that made me feel like I was on cloud nine and thecalmthat settled over me. The sense of safety and appreciation, thewonderthat flitted through my system… there wasn’t anything like it. It was as though pleasing him had become my new favorite thing and it was quickly turning into an addiction. As in I was willing to do just about anything to make him utter those two little words to me.

I mean, they seemed to have more of an effect, more of a weight, a promise, a solemn fucking vow to them than any of the times Rodney or anyone else uttered the words ‘I love you’at me.

It was strange, it was foreign, and it drove me socrazy.Like I wanted to pick it apart and see why it ticked, but I certainly didn’t want to in front of such a big audience and I was so… so… suddenly frustrated at having to share my time with Atlas.

I mean, I just wanted it to beusas in me and him and nobody else. Not his daughters, which I know was selfish and rude, and not Atlas or any other member of his club or the Voodoo Bastards.

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