Page 11 of A Brother's Secret

She sighed finally, coming out of her little zone that she went into when she drew and carefully tore the page out of the book, holding it out tome.

“Thanks,” I murmured and let my eyes graze the sizes and the little sketches she’d done, calculating how much room I had on the bike to store the extra shit. I had some leeway; I could strap a bag to the fender rack and sissy bar behind Mali. Should be able to get her straight for about a week’s worth of clothes. I nodded and creased the paper into four quadrants and set it by the television.

“Right, I’ll be back in a minute.” I went into the bathroom and put on some real clothes and my riding gear. When I came out, she was still sitting on the end of the bed, feet up, crossed at the ankle, arms loose around her knees; folded up like a lotus blossom. She’d always sat that way when we were kids and it was as alluring now as I’d found it when we were teenagers. I just didn’t know what it was about it that got me, but then again, some of the strangest things about herdid.

“What am I supposed to do while you’re gone?” she asked.

I shrugged and pulled the remote off of the dresser the television was on and handed to her. She rolled her eyes at me and made an ‘ugh’ noise; I smiled. I couldn’t blame her, hotel TV pretty much sucked.

“You could draw,” I suggested and she looked down wistfully at her sketch book, now missing apage.

“Don’t think I’m in the frame of mind to pull off anything artistic at the moment.”

“Don’t say I can blame you,” I answered, shoving her measurements into my back pocket.

She hesitated with whatever she was about to say next and I stilled, waiting her out. Finally, she spoke and what came out surprised me. She said, “Don’t take too long, ‘k?”

“Back in a flash,” I said and tried to sound both nonchalant and reassuring at the same time. Mali had never been one to display any sort of weakness or vulnerability and her softer tone along with her hesitation was an unexpected crack in the hard exoskeleton of confidence she typically hadon.

We still hadn’t really talked about things. Bits and pieces that I was slowly putting together into a mosaic depicting a timeline, but I didn’t want to push too hard. Not yet, not right now. There would be a time for that later when the buck would stop and she’d have to spill but in the interest of not piling on more frustration of her having to repeat herself ad nauseam, I let myself grow nauseous with dying to know everything in minute detail.

Mali gave me a nod and I returned it, scooping up my helmet and leaving the room, heading out to grab some items for her that would get her out of my underwear, because fuck, while I had self-control, it wasn’t endless and I didn’t want to push my luck by making a wrong move, you know? I didn’t want to be ‘that guy’ and so she needed some extra things. Things that I could provide. I honestly needed to occupy my time during the hurry up and wait. I needed to be doing something so I didn’t explode.

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