Page 34 of Brother to Brother

I looked up sharply, “Excuse me?”

“Have I ever said you’re an afterthought?”

“No…”

“Okay then,” he stood up, “finish feeding our little man, I’m going to grab a shower then I want you to get dressed so we can get going.”

“Okay,” I murmured, once again feeling thoroughly dismissed. He went into the bedroom and I sighed, putting my face in my hands.

“Mamma sad?”

“No, Baby. Mamma’s just frustrated.”

“Okay,” he said and I had to smile. I don’t recall if I’d ever gone over ‘frustrated’ but we had a long ways to go yet so it didn’t much matter.

When Archer came out of the bedroom, freshly dressed and running a towel over his hair, I had Noah wrapped up with coloring on some plain sheets of butcher paper with crayons. I rose quietly and went to slip past Archer and he stopped me with a light grip on my arm. I startled and looked up into his green-gold eyes which had always been so intense and slightly ethereal with how beautiful they were. Not that I’d ever admit it to him, that just seemed like such an awkward thing to do.

“You don’t have anything to ever be afraid of out of me,” he said. “You have my word.”

I stood there open mouthed for a moment, the proclamation from him being totally unexpected, I didn’t know what to say and what came out of my mouth was the best I could think of with how simply overloaded my mind was, “Thank you,” I said and it was apparently the right thing to say. He let me go, and inclined his head in a gentle nod and I let my feet carry me the rest of the way to the bedroom.

I dug out clothes to wear, some jeans and an old, club, ladies cut tee from the Arizona chapter. I showered and pulled my hair into a pony tail while it was still wet. I dressed slowly and deliberately and when I finished, I sat for several long moments asking myself just what it was I had done by agreeing to marry Archer… I mean, I barely knew anything about him!

I think it was just finally hitting me, and even though I knew in my heart of hearts that it was the right decision for Noah, I was afraid. For all that we’d been living together for the last few months, Archer and I might as well have been ships passing in the night with our working schedules. We didn’t speak much beyond what was for dinner, or anything regarding Noah. We didn’t talk about old times, he didn’t bother to ask anything about me, and I had treated him with the same regard.

It wasn’t like open curiosity was welcomed by the man. At best, he was coldly indifferent about my presence, at worst, he regarded it with open disdain. I had been both lucky and grateful that Archer at his worst didn’t show up but once or twice since I had arrived, the worst of it being upon my arrival and he had kept true to his word. Any negative remarks in the time since, he had kept either to himself, or had leveled them at me well outside of Noah’s presence.

Yet here I was, three or so months into mine and Noah’s stay and I had readily agreed to marry the man who might as well have been a stranger to me. Not only had I agreed to marry him, I had agreed to bear him at least one child, right along with everything that entailed. I swallowed hard and gave myself one last passing glance in the cracked mirror above the bathroom sink before rejoining my son and his uncle… my soon to behusband, out in the living area of the sad, one bedroom apartment.

Oh my god,I thought to myself,what had I agreed to do?

One look at my son and it all came rushing back, I smiled bravely at my little boy and reminded myself, likely not for the last time,I secured him a better future. That’s what I did…and it was true.

“Ready to go?” Archer asked and I gathered my purse and my keys. Noah’s diaper bag remained in the car.

“Ready,” I affirmed and hoped I looked braver than I felt. Archer looked me over with what appeared to be new eyes in that moment.

He nodded and said, “I’ll lead.”

I nodded again and found myself thinking,isn’t that what you’ve always done?

Chapter 18

Archer

“How’s she doing?” Trigger asked as we all stood around watching her disappear back into the media room.

“She’s okay, she’s tougher than she thinks she is,” I said. “Probably why she agreed to marry me so fast.”

Silence met my proclamation, “You’re gettingmarried?” Dray demanded.

“Yeah, I need to set an appointment down at the courthouse for some time this week –”

“Oh the fuck you are! Archer if I knew your first middle and last name I wouldsobe using it right now, you arenot,I repeat, you areso nottaking that away from her!”

“Woman, what the fuck are you on about?” Ghost demanded and all of us turned to where his pregnant ol’ lady, Shelly, was coming out of one of the bathrooms.

“Bad enough she drives across the country out of that hell hole she was living in, bad enough she’s had it almost as rough since she got here, now you want to take her special day away from her too!? No, justno. I need you, I needallof you to think for just a damn minute about this. Did you even get down on one knee? Did you even bother to get her a ring? I bet you didn’t.”

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